Kemper caught a slug. Ricochets ripped the convulsing man faceless. Néstor shot the driver in the back and blew him into the horn.
It went off AAAH-OOO-GAAAH, AAAH-OOO-GAAAH– LOUD LOUD LOUD.
Kemper shot the driver in the face. His glasses shattered and tore the pompadour off his toupee.
The horn blared. Néstor blew the steering wheel off the column. The goddamn horn reverberated LOUDER.
Kemper saw his collarbone push through his shirt. He weaved down the driveway wiping somebody’s blood out of his eyes. Néstor caught him and piggybacked him to their car.
Kemper heard horn noise. Kemper saw spectators on the sidewalk. Kemper saw Cubano punks by the death car–boosting that attaché case.
Kemper screamed. Néstor popped a real “H” bindle under his nose.
He gagged and sneezed. His heart revved and purred. He coughed up some pretty red blood.
Néstor gunned the car. Spectators ran for cover. That funnylooking bone flopped out at a funny right angle.
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/19/6 1. Des Moines Register headline:
FAILED COUP LINKED TO U.S. SPONSORS
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/19/61. Los Angeles Herald-Express headline:
WORLD LEADERS DECRY “ILLEGAL INTERVENTION”
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/20/61. Dallas Morning News headline:
KENNEDY BLASTED FOR “HEEDLESS PROVOCATIONS”
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/20/61. San Francisco Chronicle headline and subhead:
BAY OF PIGS FIASCO REVILED BY U.S. ALLIES
CASTRO GLOATS AS REBEL DEATH TOLL MOUNTS
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/20/61. Chicago Tribune headline and subhead:
KENNEDY DEFENDS BAY OF PIGS ACTIONS
WORLDWIDE CENSURE CRIPPLES PRESIDENT’S PRESTIGE
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/21/61. Cleveland Plain Dealer headline and subhead:
CIA BLAMED FOR BAY OF PIGS FIASCO
EXILE LEADERS BLAME “KENNEDY COWARDICE”
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/22/61. Miami Herald headline and subhead:
KENNEDY: “SECOND AIR STRIKE COULD HAVE
SPARKED WORLD WAR III”
EXILE COMMUNITY HONORS LOST AND CAPTURED HEROES
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/23/61. New York Journal-American headline and subhead:
KENNEDY DEFENDS BAY OF PIGS ACTION
RED LEADERS BLAST “IMPERIALIST AGGRESSION”
DOCUMENT INSERT: 4/24/6 1. Hush-Hush magazine article. Written by Lenny Sands, under the pseudonym Peerless Poilticopundit.
COWARDLY CASTRATO CASTRO OUSTED!
RETREATING REDS WREAK RAT-POISON REVENGE!
His rancorous Red reign ran for a rotten two years. Shout it loud, proud and un-kowtowed: Fidel Castro, the bushy-bearded beatnik bard of bilious bamboozlement, was determinedly and dramatically deposed last week by a heroically homeland-hungering huddle of hopped-up hermanos righteously rankled by the Red Recidivist’s rape of their nation!
Call it D-Day ‘61, kats &° kittens. Call the Bay of Pigs the Caribbean Carthage; Playa Giron the Patriotic Parthenon. Call Castro debilitated and depilatoried–word has it that he shaved off his beard to dodge the deep and dangerous depths of revenge-seeker recognition!
Fidel Castro: the shabbily-shorn Samson of 19611 His deliriously delighted Delilahs: God-fearing, red, white & blue revering Cuban heroes!!!
Castro and his murderously malignant machinations: trenchantly terminated, 10-4, overand-out. The Monster’s maliciously maladroit maneuverings: still morally mauling Miami!!!!
Item: Fidel Castro craves cornucopias of cash– getaway gelt to felicitously finance future finag]ings!
Item: Fidel Castro has cravenly criticized America’s eminently egalitarian and instantly inclusive racial policies, reproachfully ragging U.S. leaders for their nauseously niggling neglect of Negro citizens.
Item: as previously posited, Fidel Castro and seditious sibling Raul sell homicidally hazardous Heroin in Miami.
Item: as the Bay of Pigs waggled and waxed as Castro’s Waterloo, the mendacious mastiff’s minor miscreant minions mined Miami’s Negro section with rat-poison-riddled Heroin! Scores of Negro drug addicts injected these carcinogenic Commie cocktails and died doomonically draconean deaths!!!
Item: this issue was rushed to press, to insure that Hush-Hush readers would not be left hungrily homesick for our properly protectionist parade of Playa Giron platitudes. Thus we cannot name the aforementioned Negroes or offer specific details on their dastardly deaths. That information will appear in scintillatingly-scheduled subsequent issues, in courageous conjunction with a new ongoing feature: “Banana Republic Boxscore: Who’s Red? Who’s Dead?”
Adios, dear reader–and let’s all meet for a tall Cuba Libre in laceratingly liberated Havana.
DOCUMENT INSERT: 5/1/81. Personal note: J. Edgar Hoover to Howard Hughes.
Dear Howard,
You must not be concerning yourself with Hush-Hush these days. If you’ll glance at the April 24th issue, you’ll see that it went to press at best precipitously and at worst with a certain amount of criminal negligence and/or criminal intent.
Did Mr. L. Sands perhaps possess some spurious foreknowledge of unforetellable events? His piece mentioned a number of Negro heroin overdoses in the Miami area, and my Miami police contacts tell me that no such overdoses occurred.