Somehow that raised Eric Stranathan for her, the first and last man with whom she fell wholly in love. Across a quarter century-plus the time she had been gone on this mission-he came back, seated opposite her in a canoe on Lake Louise, among mountains, in piney air, under a night sky nearly as vast as what lay around Emissary; and staring upward, she whispered, “How do the Others see that? What is it to them?”
`What are they?” he answered. “Animals evolved beyond us; machines that think; angels dwelling by the throne of God; beings, or a being, of a kind we’ve never imagined and never can; or what? Humans have been wondering for more than a hundred years now.”
She mustered pride. “We’ll come to know.”
“Though holothetics?” he asked.
“Maybe. Else through-who can tell? But I do believe we will. I have to believe that.”
“We might not want to. I’ve got an idea we’d never be the same again, and that price might be too high.”
She shivered. “You mean we’d forsake all we have here?”
“And all we are. Yes, it’s possible.” His dear lanky form stirred, rocking the boat. “And I wouldn’t, myself. I’m so happy where I am, this moment.”
That was the night they became lovers.
Joelle shook herself. Stop. Be sensible. I’m obsessive about the Others, I know. Seeing their handiwork again serving not aliens but humans must have uncapped a wellspring in me. But Willem’s right. The Betans should be enough for many generations of my race. Do the Others know that? Did they foresee it?
She was faintly shocked to note that her attention had drifted from the intercom for minutes. She wasn’t given to introspection or daydreaming. Maybe it had happened because she was computer-linked. At such times, an operator became a greater mathematician and logician, by orders of magnitude, than had ever lived on Earth before the conjunction was developed. But the operator remained a mortal, full of mortal foolishness. I suppose my habit of close concentration while I’m in this state took over in me. Since I’m not used to dealing with emotions, the habit got out of hand.
She knew peripherally that an argument had been going on. Hearkening, she heard Archer state: “Very well, Captain Langendijk, nobody foresaw you’d return this early-if ever, to be frank-and therefore I don’t have specific orders regarding you. But my superiors did brief me and issue a general directive.”
“Ah?” replied the skipper of Emissary. “And what does that say?”
“Well, uh, well, certain highly placed people worry about more than your bringing a strange bug to Earth. The idea is, they don’t know what you might bring back. Look, I’m not saying a monster has taken over your ship and is pretending to be you, anything paranoid like that.”
“I should hope not! As a matter of fact, sir, the Betans -the name we gave them, of course -the Betans are not just friendly, they are anxious to know us well. That is why they will trade with us on terms that would else be unbelievably favorable. They stand to gain even more.”
Wariness responded: “What?”
“It would take long to explain. There is something vital they hope to learn from us.”
It twisted in Joelle, something that I have never yet really learned myself, nor ever likely will.
Archer’s voice jarred the thought out of her. “Well, maybe. Though I think that reinforces the point, that nobody can tell what the effect might be.
. . on us. And the World Union is none too stable, you know. You plan to report straight to the Council-”
“Yes,” Langendijk said. “We’ll proceed to the neighborhood of Earth, call Lima, and request instructions. What’s wrong with that?”
“Too public!” Archer exclaimed. After a few seconds: “Look, I’m not at liberty to say much. But. . . the officials I mentioned want to, uh, debrief you in strict privacy, examine your materials, that sort of thing, before they issue Side 4
Anderson, Poul – Avatar, The
any news release. Do you see?”
“M-m-m, I had my suspicions,” Langendijk rumbled. “Go on.”
“Well, under the circumstances, et cetera, I’m going to interpret my orders as follows. We’ll accompany you through the gate, to the Solar System.