“I thought I’d find you here,” he said. “Uh, how are you?”
“Beyond joy,” she answered, not looking away from heaven.
“Yes, it is a splendid sight. A shame that nobody else seems able to appreciate it. Except Joelle, I suppose, in her cold fashion… It’s for lovers.”
“Indeed it is that, Stefan.”
The mate smiled and laid an arm around her waist. She didn’t noticeably react, for or against. He nuzzled her cheek and inhaled the aromas of flesh and loosely braided hair.
“You’re a more gorgeous sight, Caitlin,” he murmured.
She chuckled. “Thank you, kind sir, for your mendacity.” The humor faded. “If you please, though, no offense intended, but I want to lose me in what we have before us, while we do.”
“Aw-w-w.” He pulled close. “Caitlin, sweetheart.”
She tensed and turned to face him squarely. “Stefan, we’ve been good comrades. You’d not be spoiling of that, would you?”
He kissed her on the mouth. She thrust back from him, not breaking his grip but gaining half a meter between all else of them. “Let me go,” she demanded.
He tugged at her. “Let me go,” she said, word by word, “or so help me the Mórrigan, I’ll put you in sickbay.”
Dozsa did. His indignation met her fury. She breathed hard. “If you doubt me,” she warned, “if you rely on your karate, you’ll be minus an eye at least, and quite likely the family jewels. I know how to take people apart as well as sew them together.”
Wrath came under mastery. “Ah, I got my temper up,” she said with an effort. “You meant no harm, I’m sure. We’ll forget the matter.”
His anger waxed. “You’re not Dan Brodersen’s woman, pure and simple,” he spat. “You’re Martti Leino’s too. And who else’s?”
She bridled afresh. “My own and nobody else’s.”
“You throw your tail around where you feel like it, eh? And I’m not good enough.”
She attempted mildness. “Stef, dear, Martti needed help. I’m not free to tell why, but he did. He does no more, most of the time. Now Dan’s the one who bleeds. Decision after terrible decision must he make, never knowing if the next will doom us. I ease the bleakness for him a little. And he is my chief person, the man I love and who loves me.”
“Yah! Tonight he’s off with Frieda. Don’t think I didn’t see the three of you whispering and the two of them leaving.”
Caitlin nodded. “Aye. She too has a need, I’ve learned. Did you ever try to know more than that big strong body? She felt so low I decided- Well, never mind.”
“How about me? Has it occurred to you I might be, be capable of suffering?”
“Oh, Stefan, ring down the curtain in that theater,” she sighed. “You’ve enjoyed Frieda many a time, and you will again. Here you just thought you saw an opportunity.” She made a fending gesture. “Aye, well I know you miss your darlings at home and dread you’ll nevermore see them. But you’re tough-souled, like me; you don’t bear the final responsibility, like Dan; nor do you- Och, the upshot is, beyond the survival help of a shipmate, we’ve naught to give each other but fun.”
“And you wouldn’t find me fun,” he said bitterly.
She laughed. “Why, fellow, I’ve looked forward to you with much interest for weeks. It’s only that conditions were never suitable.”
He brightened. “Well?”
She shook her head. “Later, maybe. I told you, Dan needs me. He’s being very kind this night, and nonetheless I had to urge him. There’s no harm in a frolic elsewhere, but I can’t risk another affair as intense as with Martti.”
Dozsa looked cheerier yet. “I promise you, CaitlIn, a frolic is all I Side 169
Anderson, Poul – Avatar, The have in mind.”
“But you took for granted you had a right to it.” Her tone was compassionate. “I’m sorry, Stef. I cannot allow that.”
The mate swallowed, stared at his hands where they clutched the chair, and at last said, “I apologize.”
“I felt sure you would be big enough to.” She stroked his cheek. “Now let us truly forget. Let us be a pair of friends, met for the admiring of an enormous beauty.”