“So, you having fun here in the park, Harper?” Penny asked suddenly, shifting her gaze once more.
Harper nodded wordlessly and edged closer to Bennett. She sensed the same thing about this woman her mother did, that something wasn’t quite right. Bennett felt suddenly exposed and vulnerable, standing at the edge of the wooded slope, away from everyone and everything in the hard edge of the winter chill. Clouds had crept out of the northwest, obscuring the sun, and the gray sky was melting down into the backdrop of the skeletal trees.
“We’ve got to be going,” Bennett advised, reaching down for Harper’s hand, keeping her eyes on Penny.
“Oh, sure,” Penny replied, smiling cheerfully, the light in her green eyes dancing, shrugging her shoulders and shifting away. “You go, girl, you need to. But, hey, you look a little uptight. Know what I mean?”
“No.” Bennett shook her head quickly, not wanting to hear any more, already sensing what was coming. “I’m fine.”
She started away, but Penny moved with her. “Well, you can say you’re fine if you want, but you are most definitely not, you know? I can tell. And I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t be fine if I didn’t have a little something to help me get by, let me tell you.”
Bennett wheeled on her. “Look, I don’t know who you are—”
“Hey, I’m just another victim of life, just another sister fighting to make it through another day.” Penny held up her hands placatingly. “You don’t need to worry about me. You think I’m the law? I’m not, girlfriend. Not hardly.” She winked. “Hope you’re not the law either, because I got something for you, you want it, something to make you feel a little better.”
Bennett heard the blood pounding inside her head. She felt the familiar pumping of adrenaline, her body’s automatic response to the possibility of a fix. Everything seemed to kick in at once, all the familiar expectancies, all the insatiable needs. She was surprised at how strong they were, even in the face of her resolve to put them aside.
Penny eased closer to her, eyes bright. “What I got, is a little white dust that doesn’t take but a single whiff to sweep you away to la-la land, smooth and easy and cream-puff sweet. You can live on this stuff for days, girl. Keeps you sharp and strong and focused, but takes the edge off, too. I got it before I came to Dullsville, knowing what it would be like. I used it day before last, and I’m still flying high.”
“No, thanks,” Bennett told her abruptly, shaking her head, starting off again. It took everything she had to say it, to make her feet move, to keep her mind focused, but she managed. “We’ve got to go.”
“Hey, wait up, Bennett!” Penny came after her quickly, keeping pace as she walked. “Don’t be mad. I wasn’t trying to jerk you around or anything. I was just trying to be nice, trying to make conversation. Hey, I’m lonely here, I admit it. You seem like me, that’s all. I was just looking for some company.” She paused. “I wasn’t going to ask you for money, you know. I was going to share, to give it to you for free.”
Bennett kept walking, trying to shut the words out, trying to make Penny go away. Even here, she was thinking. Even here, someone’s got the stuff and wants me to use. She was walking faster, practically dragging Harper, needing to escape and not wanting to, both at once.
“We could meet later and do some together,” Penny was suggesting, keeping pace effortlessly. “My place, maybe. You know, just the two of us. Granny doesn’t know what’s going on anyway, so she won’t be a bother.”
“Owee, Mommy,” Harper was complaining, trying to pull free from her mother’s grip.
Bennett shifted her hand on the little girl’s arm and looked over at Penny angrily. “I can’t—”
“What do you say?” Penny cut her short. “You want a little now? Just a taste to see if it’s worth doing some more later?”
Bennett stopped and stood with her head lowered and her eyes closed. She wanted nothing more. She wanted it so bad she could hardly wait for it to happen. She felt empty and sick inside, and she found herself thinking, What the hell difference does it make after all the other drugs I’ve done?