As You Like It by William Shakespeare, 1564-1616

Of him I was about to call his father–

Hath heard your praises, and this night he means

To burn the lodging where you use to lie

And you within it: if he fail of that,

He will have other means to cut you off.

I overheard him and his practises.

This is no place; this house is but a butchery:

Abhor it, fear it, do not enter it.

ORLANDO Why, whither, Adam, wouldst thou have me go?

ADAM No matter whither, so you come not here.

ORLANDO What, wouldst thou have me go and beg my food?

Or with a base and boisterous sword enforce

A thievish living on the common road?

This I must do, or know not what to do:

Yet this I will not do, do how I can;

I rather will subject me to the malice

Of a diverted blood and bloody brother.

ADAM But do not so. I have five hundred crowns,

The thrifty hire I saved under your father,

Which I did store to be my foster-nurse

When service should in my old limbs lie lame

And unregarded age in corners thrown:

Take that, and He that doth the ravens feed,

Yea, providently caters for the sparrow,

Be comfort to my age! Here is the gold;

And all this I give you. Let me be your servant:

Though I look old, yet I am strong and lusty;

For in my youth I never did apply

Hot and rebellious liquors in my blood,

Nor did not with unbashful forehead woo

The means of weakness and debility;

Therefore my age is as a lusty winter,

Frosty, but kindly: let me go with you;

I’ll do the service of a younger man

In all your business and necessities.

ORLANDO O good old man, how well in thee appears

The constant service of the antique world,

When service sweat for duty, not for meed!

Thou art not for the fashion of these times,

Where none will sweat but for promotion,

And having that, do choke their service up

Even with the having: it is not so with thee.

But, poor old man, thou prunest a rotten tree,

That cannot so much as a blossom yield

In lieu of all thy pains and husbandry

But come thy ways; well go along together,

And ere we have thy youthful wages spent,

We’ll light upon some settled low content.

ADAM Master, go on, and I will follow thee,

To the last gasp, with truth and loyalty.

From seventeen years till now almost fourscore

Here lived I, but now live here no more.

At seventeen years many their fortunes seek;

But at fourscore it is too late a week:

Yet fortune cannot recompense me better

Than to die well and not my master’s debtor.

Exeunt

Scene 4

The Forest of Arden.

Enter ROSALIND for Ganymede, CELIA for Aliena, and TOUCHSTONE

ROSALIND O Jupiter, how weary are my spirits!

TOUCHSTONE I care not for my spirits, if my legs were not weary.

ROSALIND I could find in my heart to disgrace my man’s

apparel and to cry like a woman; but I must comfort

the weaker vessel, as doublet and hose ought to show

itself courageous to petticoat: therefore courage,

good Aliena!

CELIA I pray you, bear with me; I cannot go no further.

TOUCHSTONE For my part, I had rather bear with you than bear

you; yet I should bear no cross if I did bear you,

for I think you have no money in your purse.

ROSALIND Well, this is the forest of Arden.

TOUCHSTONE Ay, now am I in Arden; the more fool I; when I was

at home, I was in a better place: but travellers

must be content.

ROSALIND Ay, be so, good Touchstone.

Enter CORIN and SILVIUS

Look you, who comes here; a young man and an old in

solemn talk.

CORIN That is the way to make her scorn you still.

SILVIUS O Corin, that thou knew’st how I do love her!

CORIN I partly guess; for I have loved ere now.

SILVIUS No, Corin, being old, thou canst not guess,

Though in thy youth thou wast as true a lover

As ever sigh’d upon a midnight pillow:

But if thy love were ever like to mine–

As sure I think did never man love so–

How many actions most ridiculous

Hast thou been drawn to by thy fantasy?

CORIN Into a thousand that I have forgotten.

SILVIUS O, thou didst then ne’er love so heartily!

If thou remember’st not the slightest folly

That ever love did make thee run into,

Thou hast not loved:

Or if thou hast not sat as I do now,

Wearying thy hearer in thy mistress’ praise,

Thou hast not loved:

Or if thou hast not broke from company

Abruptly, as my passion now makes me,

Thou hast not loved.

O Phebe, Phebe, Phebe!

Exit

ROSALIND Alas, poor shepherd! searching of thy wound,

I have by hard adventure found mine own.

TOUCHSTONE And I mine. I remember, when I was in love I broke

my sword upon a stone and bid him take that for

coming a-night to Jane Smile; and I remember the

kissing of her batlet and the cow’s dugs that her

pretty chopt hands had milked; and I remember the

wooing of a peascod instead of her, from whom I took

two cods and, giving her them again, said with

weeping tears ‘Wear these for my sake.’ We that are

true lovers run into strange capers; but as all is

mortal in nature, so is all nature in love mortal in folly.

ROSALIND Thou speakest wiser than thou art ware of.

TOUCHSTONE Nay, I shall ne’er be ware of mine own wit till I

break my shins against it.

ROSALIND Jove, Jove! this shepherd’s passion

Is much upon my fashion.

TOUCHSTONE And mine; but it grows something stale with me.

CELIA I pray you, one of you question yond man

If he for gold will give us any food:

I faint almost to death.

TOUCHSTONE Holla, you clown!

ROSALIND Peace, fool: he’s not thy kinsman.

CORIN Who calls?

TOUCHSTONE Your betters, sir.

CORIN Else are they very wretched.

ROSALIND Peace, I say. Good even to you, friend.

CORIN And to you, gentle sir, and to you all.

ROSALIND I prithee, shepherd, if that love or gold

Can in this desert place buy entertainment,

Bring us where we may rest ourselves and feed:

Here’s a young maid with travel much oppress’d

And faints for succor.

CORIN Fair sir, I pity her

And wish, for her sake more than for mine own,

My fortunes were more able to relieve her;

But I am shepherd to another man

And do not shear the fleeces that I graze:

My master is of churlish disposition

And little recks to find the way to heaven

By doing deeds of hospitality:

Besides, his cote, his flocks and bounds of feed

Are now on sale, and at our sheepcote now,

By reason of his absence, there is nothing

That you will feed on; but what is, come see.

And in my voice most welcome shall you be.

ROSALIND What is he that shall buy his flock and pasture?

CORIN That young swain that you saw here but erewhile,

That little cares for buying any thing.

ROSALIND I pray thee, if it stand with honesty,

Buy thou the cottage, pasture and the flock,

And thou shalt have to pay for it of us.

CELIA And we will mend thy wages. I like this place.

And willingly could waste my time in it.

CORIN Assuredly the thing is to be sold:

Go with me: if you like upon report

The soil, the profit and this kind of life,

I will your very faithful feeder be

And buy it with your gold right suddenly.

Exeunt

Scene 5

The Forest.

Enter AMIENS, JAQUES, and others

SONG.

AMIENS Under the greenwood tree

Who loves to lie with me,

And turn his merry note

Unto the sweet bird’s throat,

Come hither, come hither, come hither:

Here shall he see No enemy

But winter and rough weather.

JAQUES More, more, I prithee, more.

AMIENS It will make you melancholy, Monsieur Jaques.

JAQUES I thank it. More, I prithee, more. I can suck

melancholy out of a song, as a weasel sucks eggs.

More, I prithee, more.

AMIENS My voice is ragged: I know I cannot please you.

JAQUES I do not desire you to please me; I do desire you to

sing. Come, more; another stanzo: call you ’em stanzos?

AMIENS What you will, Monsieur Jaques.

JAQUES Nay, I care not for their names; they owe me

nothing. Will you sing?

AMIENS More at your request than to please myself.

JAQUES Well then, if ever I thank any man, I’ll thank you;

but that they call compliment is like the encounter

of two dog-apes, and when a man thanks me heartily,

methinks I have given him a penny and he renders me

the beggarly thanks. Come, sing; and you that will

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