“So when do we get to meet this paragon?” Clem asked her as they parted. “In a while,” she said.
“He’s certainly had quite an effect on you, hasn’t he?” “Has he?”
“You’re so—I don’t know the word exactly—tranquil, maybe? I’ve never seen you this way before.” “I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this way before.” “Well, just make sure we don’t lose the Judy we all know and love, huh?” Clem said. “Too much serenity’s bad for the circulation. Everybody needs a good rage once in a while.”
The significance of this exchange didn’t really strike her until the evening after, when—sitting downstairs in the quiet of the house, waiting for Oscar to come home—she realized how passive she’d become. It was almost as if the woman she’d been, the Jude of furies and opinions, had been shed like a dead skin, and now, tender and new, she had entered a time of waiting. Instruction would come, she assumed; she couldn’t live the rest of her life so becalmed. And she knew to whom she had to look for that instruction: the man whose voice in the hall made her heart rise and her head light, Oscar Godolphin,
If Oscar was the good news that those weeks brought, Kuttner Dowd was the bad. He was astute enough to realize after a very short time that she knew far less about the Dominions and their mysteries than their conversation at the Retreat had suggested, and far from being the source of information she’d hoped he’d prove, he was taciturn, suspicious, and on occasion rude, though never the last in Oscar’s company. Indeed, when all three of them were together he lavished her with respect, its irony lost on Oscar, who was so used to Dowd’s obsequious presence he barely seemed to notice the man.
Jude soon learned to match suspicion with suspicion, and several times verged on discussing Dowd with Oscar. That she didn’t was a consequence of what she’d seen at the Retreat. Dowd had dealt almost casually with the problem of the corpses, dispatching them with the efficiency of one who had covered for his employer in similar circumstances before. Nor had he sought commendation for his labor, at least not within earshot of her. When the relationship between master and servant was so ingrained that a criminal act—the disposal of murdered flesh—was passed over as an unremarkable duty, it was best, she thought, not to come between them. It was she who was the interloper here, the new girl who dreamed she’d belonged to the master forever. She couldn’t hope to have Oscar’s ear the way Dowd did, and any attempt to sow mistrust might easily rebound upon her. She kept her silence, and things went on their smooth way. Until the day of rain.
A trip to the opera had been planned for March second, and she had spent the latter half of the afternoon in leisurely preparation for the evening, idling over her choice of dress and shoes, luxuriating in indecision. Dowd had gone out at lunchtime, on urgent business for Oscar which she knew better than to inquire about. She’d been told upon her arrival at the house that any questions as to Oscar’s business would not be welcomed, and she’d never challenged that edict: it was not the place of mistresses to do so. But today, with Dowd uncharacteristically flustered as he left, she found herself wondering, as she bathed and dressed, what work Godolphin was about. Was he off in Yzordderrex, the city whose streets she assumed Gentle now walked with his soul mate the assassin? A mere two months before, with the bells of London pealing in the New Year, she’d sworn to go to Yzordderrex after him. But she’d been distracted from that ambition by the very man whose company she’d sought to take her there. Though her thoughts returned to that mysterious city now, it was without her former appetite. She’d have liked to know if Gentle was safe in those summer streets—and might have enjoyed a description of its seamier quarter—but the fact that she’d once sworn an oath to get there now seemed almost absurd. She had all that she needed here.