Blood Test by Kellerman, Jonathan

They handcuffed her–gently, it seemed–and led

-BLOOD TFST” 5

‘her to the. door. She passed by me-and OUr eyes

locked. The ebony irises seemed to moisten and

· ‘ melt. Then she hardened them, held her head high,

and was gone.

28

I FOUND Raoul in his lab, staring at a computer

screen on which were displayed columns of polyno-

mials atop a multicolored bar graph. He’d mutter in

‘Spanish, examine a page o pounds printout; then-turn to

the keyboard and rapidly type a new set ot: num-

– bets. With each additional bit o datum the height

the bars in the graph changed. The lab was

airless and fffied with acrid fmes. High-tech doodads

clicked and buzzed in the backgroul.

I pulled up a stool next to him, sat’ and said

hello.

He acknowledged me with a downward twist of

his mustache and continued to work with the computer.

The bruises on his pounds ce had turned to

purplish-green smudges.

“You know,” he said.

“Yes. She told me.”

He tped,’ hitting thc keyboard hard. The graph

convulsed.

“My ethics were no better than Valcroix’s. She

347

28

FOVNO Baoul in his lab, staring

reen on which were displayed colt

ntals atop a multicolored bar graph.

;panish, examine a page of printou

he keyboard and rapidly type a ne’

mrs. With each additional bit of dat

:-the bars in the graph’ changed.

/r/ess and fi//ed with acrid fiunes.

ads clicked and buzzed in the back

I pulled up a stool next to him,

e//o.

He acknowledged me with a dowm

s mustache and continued to work n

ter. The bruises on his face ha

rplish-green smudges.

“You know,” he said.

“Yes. She told me.”

He typed, hitting the keyboard har

nvulsed.

“My ethics were no better than V

47

tt a computer

mns of polyno-He’d

mutter in

:, then turn to

w set of nhm-um

the height

The lab was

.Iighotech doo-

‘sat’ and said

· ard twist of

th the eom.d

turned to

1. The graph

dcroix’s. She

came wiggling in here in a skintight dress and proved

that.”

I’d come to the lab with the intention of comforting

him. There were things I could have said. That

Nona had been turned into a weapon, an instrument

of vengeance, abused and twisted until sex

and rage were inexorably intertwined, then laUnChed

and aimed at a world of weak men like some kind

of heat-seeking missile. That he’d made an error

judgment but it didn’t negate all the good he’d

done. That there was more good work to be done.

That time would heal.

-But the words would have rung hollow. He was a

proud man who’d shed his pride before my eyes.

I’d witn6ssed him ragged and half-crazed in a stink-lng

cell, obsessively intent on finding bas patient.

His quest had been ignited ‘by guilt, by the mis:

taken belief that his sin–ten lust-blinded minutes

of Nona kneeling before him, ravenousmhad Caused

the removal of the boy from treatment.

Coming to see him had been a mistake. Whatever

friendship we’d had was gone, and with it, any

power I might havehad io reassure,

If salvation existed, he’d have m Find it for himself.

I plac. ed my hand on his shoulder and Wished

him well. He shrugged and stared/at the screen.

I left him with his nose buried in a pile of daB,

cursing out loud at some arcane.numerical discrep-ancyo

I drove east on Sunset slowly, and thought about

families. Milo had once told me that family.’ disputes

were a cop’s most dreaded calls, for they

were the most likely to erupt in violence that was

murderously sudden, stunningly intense. A good

BLOOD TEST 349

‘chunk of-my life had Men spent sorting out the

scrambledcommUnications, festering hostilities, and

frozen affections that characterized families in

tUrmoil.

It was easy to believe that no thing worked. That

blood ties strangled the soul.

·

BUt I knew that a cop’s reality was skewed bythe

d;a.y struggle against ‘evil, that of the psychotherapist

distorted by too many encounters withmadneSs.

There were families that worked, that nurtured

and loved. Places in the heart where a soul cold

find refuge

Soon a beautiful woman WOUld meet me on a

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