Burning Daylight by Jack London

clerks without remark, but with you–no.”

“But the world don’t know and don’t need to know,” he cried.

“Which makes it worse, in a way, feeling guilty of nothing and

yet sneaking around back-roads with all the feeling of doing

something wrong. It would be finer and braver for me

publicly…”

“To go to lunch with me on a week-day,” Daylight said, divining

the drift of her uncompleted argument.

She nodded.

“I didn’t have that quite in mind, but it will do. I’d prefer

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doing the brazen thing and having everybody know it, to doing the

furtive thing and being found out. Not that I’m asking to be

invited to lunch,” she added, with a smile; “but I’m sure you

understand my position.”

“Then why not ride open and aboveboard with me in the hills?” he

urged.

She shook her head with what he imagined was just the faintest

hint of regret, and he went suddenly and almost maddeningly

hungry for her.

“Look here, Miss Mason, I know you don’t like this talking over

of things in the office. Neither do I. It’s part of the whole

thing, I guess; a man ain’t supposed to talk anything but

business with his stenographer. Will you ride with me next

Sunday, and we can talk it over thoroughly then and reach some

sort of a conclusion. Out in the hills is the place where you

can talk something besides business. I guess you’ve seen enough

of me to know I’m pretty square. I-I do honor and respect you,

and… and all that, and I ..” He was beginning to flounder, and

the hand that rested on the desk blotter was visibly trembling.

He strove to pull himself together. “I just want to harder than

anything ever in my life before. I-I-I can’t explain myself, but

I do, that’s all. Will you?–Just next Sunday? To-morrow?”

Nor did he dream that her low acquiescence was due, as much as

anything else, to the beads of sweat on his forehead, his

trembling hand, and his all too-evident general distress.

CHAPTER XIV

“Of course, there’s no way of telling what anybody wants from

what they say.” Daylight rubbed Bob’s rebellious ear with his

quirt and pondered with dissatisfaction the words he had just

uttered. They did not say what he had meant them to say. “What

I’m driving at is that you say flatfooted that you won’t meet me

again, and you give your reasons, but how am I to know they are

your real reasons? Mebbe you just don’t want to get acquainted

with me, and won’t say so for fear of hurting my feelings. Don’t

you see? I’m the last man in the world to shove in where I’m not

wanted. And if I thought you didn’t care a whoop to see anything

more of me, why, I’d clear out so blamed quick you couldn’t see

me for smoke.”

Dede smiled at him in acknowledgment of his words, but rode on

silently. And that smile, he thought, was the most sweetly

wonderful smile he had ever seen. There was a difference in it,

he assured himself, from any smile she had ever given him before.

It was the smile of one who knew him just a little bit, of one

who was just the least mite acquainted with him. Of course, he

checked himself up the next moment, it was unconscious on her

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part. It was sure to come in the intercourse of any two persons.

Any stranger, a business man, a clerk, anybody after a few casual

meetings would show similar signs of friendliness. It was bound

to happen, but in her case it made more impression on him; and,

besides, it was such a sweet and wonderful smile. Other women he

had known had never smiled like that; he was sure of it.

It had been a happy day. Daylight had met her on the back-road

from Berkeley, and they had had hours together. It was only now,

with the day drawing to a close and with them approaching the

gate of the road to Berkeley, that he had broached the important

subject.

She began her answer to his last contention, and he listened

gratefully.

“But suppose, just suppose, that the reasons I have given are the

only ones?–that there is no question of my not wanting to know

you?”

“Then I’d go on urging like Sam Scratch,” he said quickly.

“Because, you see, I’ve always noticed that folks that incline to

anything are much more open to hearing the case stated. But if

you did have that other reason up your sleeve, if you didn’t want

to know me, if–if, well, if you thought my feelings oughtn’t to

be hurt just because you had a good job with me…” Here, his

calm consideration of a possibility was swamped by the fear that

it was an actuality, and he lost the thread of his reasoning.

“Well, anyway, all you have to do is to say the word and I’ll

clear out.

And with no hard feelings; it would be just a case of bad luck

for me. So be honest, Miss Mason, please, and tell me if that’s

the reason–I almost got a hunch that it is.”

She glanced up at him, her eyes abruptly and slightly moist, half

with hurt, half with anger.

“Oh, but that isn’t fair,” she cried. “You give me the choice of

lying to you and hurting you in order to protect myself by

getting rid of you, or of throwing away my protection by telling

you the truth, for then you, as you said yourself, would stay and

urge.”

Her cheeks were flushed, her lips tremulous, but she continued to

look him frankly in the eyes.

Daylight smiled grimly with satisfaction.

“I’m real glad, Miss Mason, real glad for those words.”

“But they won’t serve you,” she went on hastily. “They can’t

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serve you. I refuse to let them. This is our last ride, and…

here is the gate.”

Ranging her mare alongside, she bent, slid the catch, and

followed the opening gate.

“No; please, no,” she said, as Daylight started to follow.

Humbly acquiescent, he pulled Bob back, and the gate swung shut

between them. But there was more to say, and she did not ride

on.

“Listen, Miss Mason,” he said, in a low voice that shook with

sincerity; “I want to assure you of one thing. I’m not just

trying to fool around with you. I like you, I want you, and I

was never more in earnest in my life. There’s nothing wrong in

my intentions or anything like that. What I mean is strictly

honorable-”

But the expression of her face made him stop. She was angry, and

she was laughing at the same time.

“The last thing you should have said,” she cried. “It’s like

a–a matrimonial bureau: intentions strictly honorable; object,

matrimony. But it’s no more than I deserved. This is what I

suppose you call urging like Sam Scratch.”

The tan had bleached out of Daylight’s skin since the time he

came to live under city roofs, so that the flush of blood showed

readily as it crept up his neck past the collar and overspread

his face. Nor in his exceeding discomfort did he dream that she

was looking upon him at that moment with more kindness than at

any time that day. It was not in her experience to behold big

grown-up men who blushed like boys, and already she repented the

sharpness into which she had been surprised.

“Now, look here, Miss Mason,” he began, slowly and stumblingly at

first, but accelerating into a rapidity of utterance that was

almost incoherent; “I’m a rough sort of a man, I know that, and I

know I don’t know much of anything. I’ve never had any training

in nice things. I’ve never made love before, and I’ve never been

in love before either–and I don’t know how to go about it any

more than a thundering idiot. What you want to do is get behind

my tomfool words and get a feel of the man that’s behind them.

That’s me, and I mean all right, if I don’t know how to go about

it.”

Dede Mason had quick, birdlike ways, almost flitting from mood to

mood; and she was all contrition on the instant.

“Forgive me for laughing,” she said across the gate. “It wasn’t

really laughter. I was surprised off my guard, and hurt, too.

You see, Mr. Harnish, I’ve not been…”

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158

She paused, in sudden fear of completing the thought into which

her birdlike precipitancy had betrayed her.

“What you mean is that you’ve not been used to such sort of

proposing,” Daylight said; “a sort of on-the-run, ‘Howdy,

glad-to-make-your-acquaintance, won’t-you-be-mine’ proposition.”

She nodded and broke into laughter, in which he joined, and which

served to pass the awkwardness away. He gathered heart at this,

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