Carl Hiaasen – Basket Case

Emma glances up. “He really say that?”

“Word for word. Did young Maggad’s quote make it on the front?”

“If it didn’t, somebody’s out of a job.” Emma continues:

Headstrong and visionary, Polk transformed the Union-Register from a folksy, small-town journal to a dynamic, award-winning newspaper with an increasingly urban circulation of 82,500 weekdays and nearly 91,000 on Sundays.

“We turned it into a first-class outfit,” he said. “The conscience of the community.”

The only son of the Union-Register’s founder, Ford Polk, the kid known as Mac started in the newsroom fresh out of college as a telephone clerk, working his way up the ladder to managing editor.

When his father retired unexpectedly in 1959 to open a dwarf mink farm, Polk took over as publisher. His firm-handed stewardship of the paper continued until 1997, when he sold it to the Maggad-Feist Publishing Group for a reported $47 million.

“MacArthur Polk was like a second father to me,” said Race Maggad III, the chairman and chief executive officer of Maggad-Feist. “He was a teacher, a friend and an inspiration.”

This is too much for Emma, who blurts: “What a hypocritical little prick!”

The old man would be hopping mad, that’s for sure.

“Otherwise I think he’d have liked the story,” she says. “You did a nice job, Jack, considering all the distractions.”

“What are you talking about?” The piece isn’t badly done, but plainly it is not my style. “Fervid philanthropist”? Give me a break.

“What I mean,” says Emma, “is that it must’ve been hard to sit down and write this yesterday, waiting for Cleo’s goons to call.”

“But I didn’t write it, Emma. Look at the byline.”

“I am looking at the byline.”

Lunging forward, I grab the story out of her hands.

Outrageous. That craven sonofabitch Abkazion crumpled like the bumper on a Tijuana taxi. He stuck my name on top of Old Man Polk’s obituary!

“Evan wrote this,” I protest, waving the newspaper at Emma, “while Juan and I were driving to the lake.”

“I don’t get it.”

“Simple. Maggad ordered me assigned to the obit. Abkazion was scared to piss him off so he put my name on it, thus screwing a decent hardworking kid out of a byline.”

“Pretty shitty,” Emma concedes.

I turn to the jump page and skim the remainder of the obituary. There, below the last paragraph, is an italicized credit line: Staff intern Evan Richards contributed to this story.

I feel rotten and helpless. So does Emma. “You want me to read the rest of it?” she asks halfheartedly.

“Not aloud. No.”

Another illustrious milestone in the career of Jack Tagger Jr. Finally I get back on the front page, and I didn’t even write the damn story.

Soon I’ll be getting that phone call from Charles Chickle offering the cushy trustee gig, yet even the prospect of being paid to torment Race Maggad III fails to cheer me. What happened to Evan sucks; I hate seeing any reporter get shafted.

Emma tries to help by reminding me that the kid cobbled the old man’s obit from my notes, clips and interviews. “It was mostly a rewrite job,” she says. “The bulk of the work was yours.”

“Nice try.” I reach for the phone. “Has our Evan got a listed number?”

He answers on the third ring, which is encouraging. I’ve known interns who would have already hung themselves in despair.

“Hi, Jack,” he says quietly.

I launch a virulently indignant diatribe against shifty spineless editors, which Evan spoils by informing me that he is not the aggrieved party. He didn’t write the MacArthur Polk obituary, either.

“I choked, man,” he confesses. “Abkazion bailed me out. He grabbed all your notes, sat down at the city desk and banged the whole story out with, like, twenty minutes to deadline.”

“I see.”

Evan can’t stop apologizing, and he’s wearing on my nerves like a whining Chihuahua. “Once you told me the obit was for the front page,” he says, “my brain locked up big-time. I’m really sorry, Jack.”

“Don’t be. It was wrong for me to dump it on you like that.”

“What do you think Emma’s gonna do?”

“To you? Nothing,” I say. “I’m the one who’s in trouble.”

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140

Leave a Reply 0

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *