I felt so much better that I forgot my sadness. I forgot that the
world existed. The more I howled the easier it was to feel the
warmth and protection of the earth.
Hours must have passed. Suddenly I felt a blow inside of
me, behind my throat, and the sound of a bell in my cars. I
remembered what the Nagual had told Eligio and Benigno
before they jumped. He said that the feeling in the throat
came just before one was ready to change speed, and that the
sound of the bell was the vehicle that one could use to accom-
plish anything that one needed. I wanted to be a coyote then.
I looked at my arms, which were on the ground in front of
me. They had changed shape and looked like a coyote’s. I saw
the coyote’s fur on my arms and chest. I was a coyote! That
made me so happy that I cried like a coyote must cry. I felt
my coyote teeth and my long and pointed muzzle and tongue.
Somehow, I knew that I had died, but I didn’t care. It didn’t
matter to me to have turned into a coyote, or to be dead, or to
be alive. I walked like a coyote, on four legs, to the edge of
the precipice and leaped into it. There was nothing else for
me to do.
I felt that I was falling down and my coyote body turned
in the air. Then I was myself again twirling in midair. But
before I hit the bottom I became so light that I didn’t fall any-
more but floated. The air went through me. I was so light! I
believed that my death was finally coming inside me. Some-
thing stirred my insides and I disintegrated like dry sand. It
was peaceful and perfect where I was. I somehow knew that
I was there and yet I wasn’t. I was nothing. That’s all I can say
about it. Then, quite suddenly, the same thing that had made
me like dry sand put me together again. I came back to life
and I found myself sitting in the hut of an old Mazatec sor-
cerer. He told me his name was Porfirio. He said that he was
glad to see me and began to teach me certain things about
plants that Genaro hadn’t taught me. He took me with him to
where the plants were being made and showed me the mold of
plants, especially the marks on the molds. He said that if I
watched for those marks in the plants I could easily tell what
they’re good for, even if I had never seen those plants before.
Then when he knew that I had learned the marks he said
good-bye but invited me to come see him again. At that
moment I felt a strong pull and I disintegrated, like before. I
became a million pieces.
Then I was pulled again into myself and went back to see
Porfirio. He had, after all, invited me. I knew that I could
have gone anywhere I wanted but I chose Porfirio’s hut be-
cause he was kind to me and taught me. I didn’t want to risk
finding awful things instead. Porfirio took me this time to see
the mold of the animals. There I saw my own nagual animal.
We knew each other on sight. Porfirio was delighted to see
such friendship. I saw Pablito’s and your own nagual too, but
they didn’t want to talk to me. They seemed sad. I didn’t in-
sist on talking to them. I didn’t know how you had fared in
your jump. I knew that I was dead myself, but my nagual said
that I wasn’t and that you both were also alive. I asked about
Eligio, and my nagual said that he was gone forever. I remem-
bered then that when I had witnessed Eligio’s and Benigno’s
jump I had heard the Nagual giving Benigno instructions not
to seek bizarre visions or worlds outside his own. The Nagual
told him to learn only about his own world, because in doing
so he would find the only form of power available to him. The
Nagual gave them specific instructions to let their pieces ex-
plode as far as they could in order to restore their strength. I
did the same myself. I went back and forth from the tonal to
the nagual eleven times. Every time, however, I was received
by Porfirio who instructed me further. Every time my strength
waned I restored it in the nagual until a time when I restored
it so much that I found myself back on this earth.
Dona Soledad told me that Eligio didn’t have to jump into
the abyss, I said.
He jumped with Benigno, Nestor said. Ask him, he’ll tell
you in his favorite voice.
I turned to Benigno and asked him about his jump.
You bet we jumped together! he replied in a blasting
voice. But I never talk about it.
What did Soledad say Eligio did? Nestor asked.
I told them that dona Soledad had said that Eligio was
twirled by a wind and left the world while he was working in
an open field.
She’s thoroughly confused, Nestor said. Eligio was
twirled by the allies. But he didn’t want any of them, so they
let him go. That has nothing to do with the jump. La Gorda
said that you had a bout with allies last night; I don’t know
what you did, but if you had wanted to catch them or entice
them to stay with you, you had to spin with them. Sometimes
they come of their own accord to the sorcerer and spin him.
Eligio was the best warrior there was so the allies came to him
of their own accord. If any of us want the allies, we would
have to beg them for years, and even if we did, I doubt that
the allies would consider helping us.
Eligio had to jump like everybody else. I witnessed his
jump. He was paired with Benigno. A lot of what happens to
us as sorcerers depends on what your partner does. Benigno
is a bit off his rocker because his partner didn’t come back.
Isn’t that so, Benigno?
You bet it is! Benigno answered in his favorite voice.
I succumbed at that point to a great curiosity that had
plagued me from the first time I had heard Benigno speak. I
asked him how he made his booming voice. He turned to face
me. He sat up straight and pointed to his mouth as if he wanted
me to look fixedly at it.
I don’t know! he boomed. I just open my mouth and this
voice comes out of it!
He contracted the muscles of his forehead, curled up his lips
and made a profound booing sound. I then saw that he had
tremendous muscles in his temples, which had given his head
a different contour. It was not his hairline that was different
but the whole upper front part of his head.
Genaro left him his noises, Nestor said to me. Wait until
he farts.
I had the feeling that Benigno was getting ready to demon-
strate his abilities.
Wait, wait, Benigno, I said, it’s not necessary.
Oh, shucks! Benigno exclaimed in a tone of disappoint-
ment. I had the best one just for you.
Pablito and Nestor laughed so hard that even Benigno lost
his deadpan expression and cackled with them.
Tell me what else happened to Eligio, I asked Nestor after
they had calmed down again.
After Eligio and Benigno jumped, Nestor replied, the
Nagual made me look quickly over the edge, in order to catch
the sign the earth gives when warriors jump into the abyss. If
there is something like a little cloud, or a faint gust of wind,
the warrior’s time on earth is not over yet. The day Eligio
and Benigno jumped I felt one puff of air on the side Benigno
had jumped and I knew that his time was not up. But Eligio’s
side was silent.
What do you think happened to Eligio? Did he die?
All three of them stared at me. They were quiet for a mo-
ment. Nestor scratched his temples with both hands. Benigno
giggled and shook his head. I attempted to explain but Nestor
made a gesture with his hands to stop me.
Are you serious when you ask us questions? he asked me.
Benigno answered for me. When he was not clowning, his
voice was deep and melodious. He said that the Nagual and
Genaro had set us up so all of us had pieces of information that
the others did not have.
Well, if that’s the case we’ll tell you what’s what, Nestor
said, smiling as if a great load had been lifted off his shoulders.
Eligio did not die. Not at all.
Where is he now? I asked.