Upper hand well and truly secured, the receptionist stood back like a matador and gestured for the bull to go by.
The management thanks you for your patronage. Please don’t call again.’
Game, set and match to the man with the rug. What the hell; there were other hotels, other foyers, other receptionists. He didn’t have to take all this shit.
As Gavin pushed the door open he threw a smiling ‘Be seeing you’ over his shoulder. Perhaps that would make the tick sweat a little one of these nights when he was walking home and he heard a young man’s step on the street behind him. It was a petty satisfaction, but it was something.
The door swung closed, sealing the warmth in and Gavin out. It was colder, substantially colder, than it had been when he’d stepped into the foyer. A thin drizzle had begun, which threatened to worsen as he hurried down Park Lane towards South Kensington. There were a couple of hotels on the High Street he could hole up in for a while; if nothing came of that he’d admit defeat.
The traffic surged around Hyde Park Corner, speeding to Knightsbridge or Victoria, purposeful, shining. He pictured himself standing on the concrete island between the two contrary streams of cars, his fingertips thrust into his jeans (they were too tight for him to get more than the first joint into the pockets), solitary, forlorn.
A wave of unhappiness came up from some buried place in him. He was twenty-four and five months. He had hustled, on and off and on again since he was seventeen, promising himself that he’d find a marriageable widow (the gigolo’s pension) or a legitimate occupation before he was twenty-five.
But time passed and nothing came of his ambitions. He just lost momentum and gained another line beneath the eye.
And the traffic still came in shining streams, lights signalling this imperative or that, cars full of people with ladders to climb and snakes to wrestle, their passage isolating him from the bank, from safety, with its hunger for destination.
He was not what he’d dreamed he’d be, or promised his secret self.
And youth was yesterday.
Where was he to go now? The flat would feel like a prison tonight, even if he smoked a little dope to take the edge off the room. He wanted, no, he needed to be with somebody tonight. Just to see his beauty through somebody else’s eyes. Be told how perfect his proportions were, be wined and dined and flattered stupid, even if it was by Quasimodo’s richer, uglier brother. Tonight he needed a fix of affection.
The pick-up was so damned easy it almost made him forget the episode in the foyer of the Imperial. A guy of fifty-five or so, well-heeled: Gucci shoes, a very classy overcoat. In a word: quality.
Gavin was standing in the doorway of a tiny art-house cinema, looking over the times of the Truffaut movie they were showing, when he became aware of the punter staring at him. He glanced at the guy to be certain there was a pick-up in the offing. The direct look seemed to unnerve the punter; he moved on; then he seemed to change his mind, muttered something to himself, and retraced his steps, showing patently false interest in the movie schedule. Obviously not too familiar with this game, Gavin thought; a novice.
Casually Gavin took out a Winston and lit it, the flare of the match in his cupped hands glossing his cheekbones golden. He’d done it a thousand times, as often as not in the mirror for his own pleasure. He had the glance up from the tiny fire off pat: it always did the trick. This time when he met the nervous eyes of the punter, the other didn’t back away.
He drew on the cigarette, flicking out the match and letting it drop. He hadn’t made a pick-up like this in several months, but he was well satisfied that he still had the knack. The faultless recognition of a potential client, the implicit offer in eyes and lips, that could be construed as innocent friendliness if he’d made an error.