“Susan,” continued Bellows after a pause, “you’ve got to give up this self-destructive crusade. I mean it’s absolutely sure suicide. Susan, there’s one thing about medicine, you’ve got to flow with the river or you’ll drown. I’ve learned that. God, whatever could have possessed you to go to Harris, especially after that little episode yesterday?”
Susan sipped her coffee in silence, keeping her eyes on Bellows. She wanted him to talk because it sounded good; he seemed to care. But also she wanted him to get involved, if that were at all possible. Bellows shook his head as he took a drink of his coffee.
“Harris is powerful, but he’s not omnipotent around here,” added Bellows. “Stark can reverse anything Harris does if he has reason to do so. Stark has raised most of the money for construction around here, millions. So people listen to what he says. So why not give him a reason; why not pretend to be a normal medical student for a few days? Christ, I need it myself. Guess who was on rounds this morning to welcome you medical students? Stark. And the first thing he wanted to know was why there were only three students out of five. Well I told him that, foolishly enough, I had taken you all in to see a case on the first day, and one of you had fainted and smashed his head on the floor. You can guess how that went over. And then I couldn’t think of anything appropriate to say about you. So I said you were doing a literature search on coma following anesthesia. I decided that since I couldn’t think of a good lie I might as well tell the truth. Well he immediately assumed that it had been my idea to put you on the project. I cannot repeat what he said to me in response. It should be enough for me to say that I need you to behave like a normal medical student. I’ve covered for you to the extent that I’m already overdrawn.”
Susan felt an urge to touch Bellows, kind of a reassuring people-to-people hug. But she didn’t; instead she played with her coffee spoon with her head down. Then she looked at Bellows.
“I’m really sorry if I’ve caused you some difficulties, Mark, really I am. Needless to say, it was unintentional. I’m the first to admit this thing has gotten out of hand so rapidly that it’s uncanny. I started because of an emotional crisis of sorts. Nancy Greenly is the same age as I, and I’ve had some occasional irregularities with my periods, probably just like Nancy Greenly. I cannot help but feel some … some kinship with her. And then Berman … what a Goddamned coincidence. By the way, did Berman have an EEG?”
“Yeah, it was completely flat. The brain is gone.”
Susan searched Bellows’s face for some response, some sign of emotion. Bellows lifted the coffee cup to his lips and took a sip.
“The brain is gone?”
“Gone.”
Susan bit her lower lip and looked down into her coffee cup. A small amount of oil opalesced on the surface in colorful swirls. Somehow she had expected the news, but it still cut into her and she fought with her mind, suppressing emotion as best she could.
“Are you OK?” asked Bellows, reaching across and gently lifting her chin with his hands.
“Don’t say anything for a second,” said Susan, not daring to look at him. The last thing she wanted to do was cry and if Bellows persisted, it would happen. Bellows cooperated and returned to his coffee while keeping his eyes on Susan.
After a few moments Susan looked up; her eyelids were slightly reddened.
“Anyway,” continued Susan, avoiding eye contact with Bellows, “I started with an emotional sort of commitment, but that quickly mixed with intellectual commitment. I really thought I had stumbled onto something … a new disease or a new complication of anesthesia or a new syndrome … something, I don’t know what. But then there was another change. The problem loomed bigger than I had imagined initially. They’ve had coma cases on the medical floors as well as in surgery. On top of that, there were those deaths you told me about. I know you think it’s crazy, but I think they are related, and the pathologist intimated they have had a number of such cases. My intuition tells me there is something else in all this, something … I don’t know how to explain it… call it supernatural or call it sinister …”