Dickens, Charles – The Uncommercial Traveller

was an awkward sea, and the funnel seems of my opinion, for it

gives a complaining roar.

The wind blows stiffly from the Nor-East, the sea runs high, we

ship a deal of water, the night is dark and cold, and the shapeless

passengers lie about in melancholy bundles, as if they were sorted

out for the laundress; but for my own uncommercial part I cannot

pretend that I am much inconvenienced by any of these things. A

general howling, whistling, flopping, gurgling, and scooping, I am

aware of, and a general knocking about of Nature; but the

impressions I receive are very vague. In a sweet faint temper,

something like the smell of damaged oranges, I think I should feel

languidly benevolent if I had time. I have not time, because I am

under a curious compulsion to occupy myself with the Irish

melodies. ‘Rich and rare were the gems she wore,’ is the

particular melody to which I find myself devoted. I sing it to

myself in the most charming manner and with the greatest

expression. Now and then, I raise my head (I am sitting on the

hardest of wet seats, in the most uncomfortable of wet attitudes,

but I don’t mind it,) and notice that I am a whirling shuttlecock

between a fiery battledore of a lighthouse on the French coast and

a fiery battledore of a lighthouse on the English coast; but I

don’t notice it particularly, except to feel envenomed in my hatred

of Calais. Then I go on again, ‘Rich and rare were the ge-ems shee-

e-e wore, And a bright gold ring on her wa-and she bo-ore, But O

her beauty was fa-a-a-a-r beyond’ – I am particularly proud of my

execution here, when I become aware of another awkward shock from

the sea, and another protest from the funnel, and a fellow-creature

at the paddle-box more audibly indisposed than I think he need be –

‘Her sparkling gems, or snow-white wand, But O her beauty was fa-aa-

a-a-r beyond’ – another awkward one here, and the fellow-creature

with the umbrella down and picked up – ‘Her spa-a-rkling ge-ems, or

her Port! port! steady! steady! snow-white fellow-creature at the

paddle-box very selfishly audible, bump, roar, wash, white wand.’

As my execution of the Irish melodies partakes of my imperfect

perceptions of what is going on around me, so what is going on

around me becomes something else than what it is. The stokers open

the furnace doors below, to feed the fires, and I am again on the

box of the old Exeter Telegraph fast coach, and that is the light

of the for ever extinguished coach-lamps, and the gleam on the

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Dickens, Charles – The Uncommercial Traveller

hatches and paddle-boxes is THEIR gleam on cottages and haystacks,

and the monotonous noise of the engines is the steady jingle of the

splendid team. Anon, the intermittent funnel roar of protest at

every violent roll, becomes the regular blast of a high pressure

engine, and I recognise the exceedingly explosive steamer in which

I ascended the Mississippi when the American civil war was not, and

when only its causes were. A fragment of mast on which the light

of a lantern falls, an end of rope, and a jerking block or so,

become suggestive of Franconi’s Circus at Paris where I shall be

this very night mayhap (for it must be morning now), and they dance

to the self-same time and tune as the trained steed, Black Raven.

What may be the speciality of these waves as they come rushing on,

I cannot desert the pressing demands made upon me by the gems she

wore, to inquire, but they are charged with something about

Robinson Crusoe, and I think it was in Yarmouth Roads that he first

went a seafaring and was near foundering (what a terrific sound

that word had for me when I was a boy!) in his first gale of wind.

Still, through all this, I must ask her (who WAS she I wonder!) for

the fiftieth time, and without ever stopping, Does she not fear to

stray, So lone and lovely through this bleak way, And are Erin’s

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