`T’ain’t mine to sell,’ said the barman.
`So, whose?’
The barman nodded at the big guy setting up on the stage. Big fat guy, moving slow, balding.
Ford nodded. He grinned.
`OK,’ he said. `Get the beers, get the rolls. Keep the tab open.’
Arthur sat at the bar and rested. He was used to not knowing what was going on. He felt comfortable with it. The beer was pretty good and made him a little sleepy which he didn’t mind at all. The bacon rolls were not bacon rolls. They were Perfectly Normal Beast rolls. He exchanged a few professional roll-making remarks with the barman and just let Ford get on with whatever Ford wanted to do.
`OK,’ said Ford, returning to his stool. `It’s cool. We got the pink thing.’
The barman was very surprised. `He’s selling it to you?’
`He’s giving it to us for free,’ said Ford, taking a gnaw at his roll. `Hey, no, keep the tab open though. We have some items to add to it. Good roll.’
He took a deep pull of beer.
`Good beer,’ he added. `Good ship too,’ he said, eying the big pink and chrome insect-like thing, bits of which could be seen through the windows of the bar. `Good everything, pretty much. You know, he said, sitting back, reflectively, `it’s at times like this that you kind of wonder if it’s worth worrying about the fabric of space/time and the causal integrity of the multi-dimensional probability matrix and the potential collapse of all wave forms in the Whole Sort of General Mish Mash and all that sort of stuff that’s been bugging me. Maybe I feel that what the big guy says is right. Just let it all go. What does it matter? Let it go.’
`Which big guy?’ said Arthur.
Ford just nodded towards the stage. The big guy was saying `one two’ into the mike a couple of times. Couple other guys were on the stage now. Drums. Guitar.
The barman, who had been silent for a moment or two, said, `You say he’s letting you have his ship?’
`Yeah,’ said Ford. `Let it all go is what he said. Take the ship. Take it with my blessing. Be good to her. I will he good to her.’
He took a pull at his beer again.
`Like I was saying,’ he went on. `It’s at times like this that you kind of think, let it all go. But then you think of guys like InfiniDim Enterprises and you think, they are not going to get away with it. They are going to suffer. It is my sacred and holy duty to see those guys suffer. Here, let me put something on the tab for the singer. I asked for a special request and we agreed. It’s to go on the tab. OK?’
`OK,’ said the barman, cautiously. Then he shrugged. `OK, however you want to do it. How much?’
Ford named a figure. The barman fell over amongst the bottles and glasses. Ford vaulted quickly over the bar to check that he was all right and help him back up to his feet. He’d cut his finger and his elbow a bit and was feeling a little woozy but was otherwise fine. The big guy started to sing. The barman hobbled off with Ford’s credit card to get authorisation.
`Is there stuff going on here that I don’t know about?’ said Arthur to Ford.
`Isn’t there usually?’ said Ford.
`No need to be like that,’ said Arthur. He began to wake up. `Shouldn’t we be going?’ he said suddenly. `Will that ship get us to Earth?’
`Sure will,’ said Ford.
`That’s where Random will be going!’ said Arthur with a start. `We can follow her! But… er…’
Ford let Arthur get on with thinking things out for himself while he got out his old edition of the Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
`But where are we on the probability axis thing?’ said Arthur. `Will the Earth be there or not there? I spent so much time look- ing for it. All I found was planets that were a bit like it or not at all like it, though it was clearly the right place because of the continents. The worst version was called NowWhat where I got bitten by some wretched little animal. That’s how they commu- nicated, you know, by biting each other. Bloody painful. Then half the time, of course, the Earth isn’t even there because it’s been blown up by the bloody Vogons. How much sense am I making?’