‘There is nothing you cannot do, my son.’ My mother adored me. She was the truth.
‘He is useless. Good for nothing. It is hard to believe that I sired him.’
‘A talent for fighting is not what made the Avatar great, boy. The mind. Use the mind.’ Endar-sen, my teacher. Without him I would have been lost.
The sounds grew, voices screaming, shouting, whispering, singing. Talaban fought for sanity amid the noise. Where were the bright stars and the music of the universe?
‘They will come,’ came the voice of the One-Eyed-Fox. ‘First you must fall inward and then we will fly outward. Listen to the voices. Know who you are’
‘I know who I am.’
‘No. Find what was lost.’
Touchstone. He is lost.’
‘Find first the lost man within yourself, Talaban. Then seek Touchstone.’
‘I don’t understand!’ But he did understand – and tumbled into an ocean of voices.
‘A man must have a dream, Talaban,’ said Endar-sen. ‘Without it we are merely animate. We eat and drink, but we gain no sustenance. We listen and talk but we learn nothing of value. We breathe, but we do not live. What is your dream?’
‘There is nothing you cannot do, my son. You are special.’
‘I have no dream! There is no dream for me. All dreams died beneath the ice. All hope was buried there.’
‘Loathsome child. Can you not master even simple tasks?’
‘Come to me, Talaban. I will be yours and yours alone.’ Cbryssa was the best of them. She loved me. With her I could have built dreams. The sounds faded and he saw again the last meeting, her fragile beauty almost gone, her skin like glass. No-one understood the nature of the disease. It afflicted perhaps one in ten thousand Avatars. They called it Crystal-wed. Use of crystals somehow changed the body chemistry. Soft tissue hardened, the body taking on the properties of the crystals themselves. Once it had begun there was no reversing it. Sometimes the process would be slow and agonizing, at others swift and terrifying. Chryssa had thankfully fallen into the latter group. Talaban had sat beside her bed. He could not hold her hand, for fear of breaking her fingers. She had lost the power of speech, and only her eyes – sweet, blue eyes – remained soft and moist. He told her he loved her, would love her for all time. A tear appeared on her crystal cheek, then her eyes hardened, and she was gone.
The world ended then for him, and the fall of the world the following year was an anti-climax.
The pain of the memory was intense. It burned him and chilled him.
That was the day I lost everything, he thought.
‘No. That was the day you surrendered everything,’ said the One-Eyed-Fox. ‘Today is the day you reclaim it.’
The voices were gone now and Talaban floated free, high and fast, spinning and turning.
Below him the blue planet shone like a midnight lantern. His speed increased, the planet shrinking to a tiny pebble. Two comets flashed across his path, drawn towards a colossal planet, and plunging deep into the huge storm clouds that swirled around it. Great plumes of fire billowed out.
Talaban flew on.
Now he could hear the music, the heartbeat of the cosmos. He yearned to be a part of it, to let himself go and live among the rhythms of eternity. ‘Hold fast!’ ordered the One-Eyed Fox. ‘That is the route Touchstone chose.’
Talaban dragged his mind from the music and reached out. There was nothing.
‘Close your eyes and picture the medicine pouch. Touchstone will be drawn to you.’
He was no longer spinning. He was floating, suspended amid the stars. Closing his eyes he followed the advice of the shaman. He could feel the medicine bag in his left hand. Something whispered against his fingers. He grabbed at it and missed. It came again – and this time his fingers hooked to the surface. A sharp pain lanced into his arm. Opening his eyes he saw a huge mottled snake, its fangs embedded in his arm. His fingers jerked open, but he overcame his fear and gripped the round body once more. The snake’s fangs flashed for his face, sinking deep, and he could feel the poison seeping into his flesh.