“That day at the golf course,” I said. “What happened?”
“What happened? Nothing happened. We played a few holes, finally I said I was bored, started nagging and whining to be taken home. He tried to convince me. I sat down on the green and wouldn’t budge. He got mad—got all red-faced like he does, finally drove me home, steaming. Mom was in her room— It was obvious she’d been crying. I thought it had to do with me. I thought everything had to do with me—thought it all the time, and it just sat there in my head like a tumor. Now I know better; they were totally messed up all along.”
She crossed her legs. “A few weeks later he walked out. Filed for divorce without telling her. She tried to get child support out of him, he claimed business was lousy, never gave us a penny. I told her to sue his ass, but she didn’t. Not a fighter—she never has been.”
“So you lived with her.”
“For a little while. If you call it living. We lost the house, moved into an apartment in Panorama City, real dive—gunshots at night, the whole bit. Things sucked, we were broke, she was always crying. But I was having a great time ’cause she wasn’t even trying to discipline me and finally I could do what I wanted. She wouldn’t fight with me either.”
She took a tissue from the box I position strategically, crumpled it into a ball, picked it open.
“Men suck,” she said, staring at me. “Now let’s talk about last night.”
“Last night was unfortunate.”
Her eyes sparked. “Unfortunate? That’s the best you can do? You know the problem with this goddamn world? No one ever says they’re sorry.”
“Lauren—”
“Forget it.” She waved the tissue dismissively. “I don’t know why I even bothered.” She began rummaging through the leather bag. “End of session. How much do you charge now? Probably more, now that your name gets in the papers.”
“Please, Lauren—”
“No,” she said, shooting to her feet. “The time’s mine, so don’t tell me how to spend it. No one tells me what to do anymore. That’s what I like about my job.”
“Being in control.”
Her hands slapped onto her hips, and she glared down at me. “I know you’re giving me shrink talk, but in this case you happen to be right. Last night you were probably too turned on to notice, but I was in charge— Michelle and me. All you guys with your mouths hanging open and your dicks stiff, and we were calling the shots. So don’t judge me as if I’m some brainless slut.”
“No judgments.”
Her hands fisted and she stepped closer. “Why’d you have to leave like that? Why were you ashamed of me?”
As I considered my answer, she gave a knowing smile. “I turned you on and that freaked you out.”
I said, “If you were a stranger, I probably would’ve stuck around. I left because I was ashamed of myself.”
She smirked. “ProteWy would’ve stuck around?”
I didn’t answer.
“But we are strangers,” she said. “How can you say we’re not?”
“The fact that you’re here—”
“So what?”
“Lauren, once you came to me for help, I had a duty to be there for you. Like a surrogate parent. I felt my presence caused you shame too, but it was my own embarrassment that got me out of there.”
“How noble,” she said. “Man, you’re confused. Like all guys are— Okay, I got what I came for. Now I’m going to pay you.”
“There’s nothing to pay for.”
She wagged a finger. “Oh no, you don’t. You’ve got the title and respectability, and in your eyes I’m just some stripper-slut. But once I pay you, the balance of power equalizes.”
“I am not judging you, Lauren.”
“You say.” She whipped a wad of cash out of her jeans pocket. “What’s the tab, Doc?”
“Let’s talk about—”
“How much?” she demanded. “What’s your hourly fee?”
I told her. She whistled. “Not too shabby.” She peeled off bills, handed them to me. “Okay, here you go, and you don’t even have to declare it to the IRS. I’ll find my own way out.”