Hit or Myth by Robert Asprin

“The wedding!” I said. “I should have known. That means that by calling off the wedding, I can eliminate two problems at once; Queen Hemlock, and the Mob!”

Badaxe scowled at me.

“I thought we had already discarded that option. Remember Grimble and the citizenry of Possiltum?”

Without thinking, I slammed the flat of my hand down on the table with a loud slap.

“Will you forget about Grimble and the citizenry of Possiltum? I’m tired of being in a box, General, and one way or another I’m going to blast a way out!”

From the expressions of my advisors, I realized I might have spoken louder than I had intended. With a conscious effort, I modulated my tone and my mood.

“Look, General . . . Hugh,” I said carefully. “You may be used to the pressures of command, but this is new to me. I’m a magician, remember? Forgive me if I get a little razzled trying to find a solution to the problem that your … I mean, our King has dropped in my lap. Okay?”

He nodded curtly, but still didn’t relax.

“Now, your point has merit,” I continued, “but it overlooks a few things. First, Grimble isn’t here. When and if he does get back, he’ll have the king in tow, and friend Rodrick can solve the problem for us… at least the problem with the Queen. As for the citizenry of Possiltum . . . between you and me I’m almost ready to face their protests rather than have to deal with Queen Hemlock. Now if you weigh the disappointment of our people over having to continue the status quo against having both the Queen and the Mob move in on a permanent basis, what result do you get? Thinking of the welfare of the kingdom, of course!”

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