“—whereas ‘id’ is not a scientific concept; it is merely the first syllable of ‘idiot!’ . . . as my esteemed colleague should know best” “—will be order in the courtroom.”
“—let me cite the incontestable conclusions of that great scientist—” “garbage in, garbage out! Any graduate assistant can draw pretty graph~ and make half-bright conclusions from irrelevant data.” “may I ask my esteemed colleague to repeat that slur outside the courtroom?” “—Bailiff is directed to keep order during—”
(“Jake, with any luck we’ll get this so fouled up that nobody can play left field.”)
“—with those bright lights. Don’t shine them in my eyes, or KPOX will lack your services a few days.” “—inquire of the Court whether esteemed Counsel has any serious purpose in subjecting the Court and these spectators to the offensive sight of this grisly carcass?” (“—can’t stand it myself, Jake; did I really look that bad? I still think we should take a dive on this.” “Hush, dear, Mac knows what be is doing and so do I.”) “—respectfully suggest that the witness himself should be conclusively identified before his testimony can be used to identify another person.” “—State and County. This set of prints I am now projecting on the screen you have just seen me take from the cadaver marked exhibit MM. I will now compare them with prints supplied by Veterans Administration Archives and previously marked as exhibit JJ, using jump-stereo superposition—” “—personally take those photographs which you now hold and which have been tentatively marked as exhibit SS, numbers one through one hundred twenty-seven?”
“—will not be cleared. This will be a public hearing. But the Court will take time to sentence for contempt as needed, and Evelyn, you can start by putting that spectator, that one, the woman with the glasses and the fright wig, on ice for ten days. Get her name, give it to the Clerk, take her away. Any more morons who can’t keep quiet? You back there, eating a candy bar; stuff it into your pocket, this is not a lunchroom.”
“Is Counsel for the challenged party suggesting that this is not José Branca?” “Goodness, no, I’ll help identify him if you need me. I’m simply urging that you lay a proper foundation.” (“Jake, Joe looks ghastly. I must go see him as soon as this nonsense is over.” “Do you think that is wise?” “I don’t know, Jake. But I know that I must.”)
“Look around you, Mr. Branca. Tell the Court—tell the Judge, that is——whether or not your wife is in this room?” “Not here!” “Mr. Branca, look where I am pointing.” “Not here, I told you!” “Your Honor, we are faced with a reluctant witness. It becomes necessary to lead him.” “Very well. But Counsel is reminded that he cannot impeach his own witness.” “Thank you, Your Honor. Mr. Branca, I am pointing at this young woman, look at her closely. I have my hand on her shoulder—” “Keep your hands to yourself! Judge, if he puts a hand on me again, I’ll bite it!” “Order. Counsel, it is not necessary to touch the challenged party, and you will not do so again. Your witness knows which young woman you mean.” “Very well, Your Honor—and if I have given offense to this young lady, I am sorry. Mr. Branca, I put it to you that this is your wife, Eunice Branca née Evans.”
“Not Eunice. She dead. Judge, do I gotta take this kark? That lyin’ fixer knows t’ score, he talk to me two, three hours. Sure, that’s Eunice’ body. But she’s dead. Everybody knows what happen.”
“Sorry, Your Honor. Mr. Branca, please confine yourself to answering my questions. You say your wife is dead …but did you ever see your wife Eunice Branca dead?”
“Huh? No. This Operation—”
“Just answer the question. You never at any time saw her dead. I put it to you that you were paid one million dollars to testify that this woman is not your wife Eunice Branca.” (“Jake, can they do this to Joe? Look at him.” “I’m sorry, darling. I didn’t call him.”)
“Judge, this karky bastard’s lyin’! They got this club, see? Rare Blood. I got this funny blood, see? Eunice, too.