John D McDonald – Travis McGee 07 Darker Than Amber

“Well, money is money. I mean you can’t buy happiness, sir, but it sure takes the sting out of being unhappy.”

“Unhappy. I knew you had understanding. And bored, Albert. The days become the same.” I turned on the stool and looked around at the lounge area. The brown-breasted piano player had changed to a blue gown with a V down to the navel, and evidently with some concealed device which kept it anchored just unboard of the nipple areas. When I swung back I swayed slightly, closed my eyes, opened them again, lifted my drink and looked at the cocktail napkin. “Yes. Of course. The Annex. I have been in a great many places this evening, Albert. I have talked with many many many people. Few of them had understanding. They cannot comprehend the tragic trauma of our times. Someone suggested I return here. I have forgotten who. Perhaps I was misled. A rather large fellow, as I remember. The evening blurs. That is what happens to evenings. They all blur, merge, become meaningless. Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. Albert, I know you have understanding. You have proven that. But do you have tolerance for the mistakes of others?”

“The way I see it, anybody can make a mistake, sir. Right?”

“You are also a philosopher. My mistake would be tactical, Albert. The large chap at an unremembered place implied get that word, Albert… implied that here I might find an ear, a little pussycat ear into which I could tell my tale of sadness, my need of cheer. Man is a lonely animal, Albert. And every place is a lonely place. If I have asked for some service the house does not, could not, would not provide, I am truly sorry for having offended you. I beg your pardon most humbly, my dear fellow.”

He set to work increasing the gleam of an already polished glass. “Well, sir, let me say this. You won’t find a nicer place on the beach. Now suppose, just suppose some girl comes in here. Now understand, I don’t mean any hooker. I mean an upper-grade girl, and she’s restless, and maybe something has happened, boyfriend trouble, and she’s hurting a little. You understand? So she’s at my bar and she has one over the limit and maybe her judgment isn’t too good and some bum starts moving in on her. What do I do? When I say bum, I mean maybe he’s got a two-hundred-dollar suit, a bill-clip full of money, he’s still a bum in my book. What I do, I chill the bum off her, and when I get a chance, I see that she gets to be with the kind of man anybody can see is a real gentleman-like yourself, sir. That way nobody gets hurt. Nobody has any regrets. Anytime you get two nice people together, it makes you feel good.”

“Albert, you continue to amaze me.”

“Freshen that drink up, sir?”

“Splendid idea. But to go back to the topic again, it would mean I would have to be on hand at precisely the right moment. And so our discussion is purely academic.”

“Sir, in one way it is and in another way it isn’t. It’s really kind of a weird coincidence you came in here tonight again and we got into this kind of a talk. It’s like fate or some thing. It so happens there is this girl works cocktail waitress here. She’s really a great kid. Just great. And the trouble she’s been having..

I held up my hand to stop him. I closed my eyes, swayed slightly, holding on to the padded rail.

“You okay, sir?”

“I do not mean to spurn your suggestion, dear chap. I wished one moment to recollect a few names the large fellow mentioned. Doubtless they are dear friends of his and, if I have the right place, well-known here. A Miss Tami Western, a Miss Barntree, or a Miss… the name escapes me. Del something. Slender.”

Albert scuttled back into his weasel hole and slammed his little doors. He wanted some time to reappraise the situation, and so he excused himself and went down the bar and served the few other customers in his section.

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