Johnithan Kellerman – Bad Love

BB D late, but less–15 min. Some anx. Hrng vcs? Denies, says strss, alchl–drnkng with G. Talked re G, re rel bet D and G. Some anx, defens, but also opn-mind. More p-c, but ok, relieves anx. O.K.

BB D looking lippy. Vry vrbl, no angr, no hrng vcs. G not there.

conflict bet G and D? P-c, tried to kss, no hostile when I say no.

Good!

Approp soc sklls! Rah rah!

BB The final note was dated three weeks before Becky’s murder: D early–positv change! Yeah! G waits in hall. Definit hostile. Rel bet D and G straind? Re me? D’s growth a stress on G? More p-c.

Kss, but quick. Much affectn. Talk re this. Boundaries, lmts, etc. D a little down, but dealt w it, approp.

BB “‘P-c,'” I said, putting the papers down. “Physical contact,” she said, miserably. “I went over and over it and it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

I reread the notes. “I think you’re right.”

“Hewitt was getting attached to her. Progressively more physical.”

She shuddered. “Look at the last one. She let him kiss her. She must have totally lost control of the situation. I had no idea–she never told me.”

“She obviously thought of telling you–‘talk to JJ?”” “But she didn’t follow through. Look what she wrote right after that.” I read out loud: ” Worth the progress? Yes!” Sounds like she convinced herself she was helping him.”

“She convinced herself she knew what she was doing.” She shook her head and looked down at the table. “My God.”

other notes that had somehow been misfiled. With all the upheaval right after, housekeeping wasn’t exactly a high priority. I didn’t find anything, so I asked Mary, my secretary. She said all Becky’s active charts had been distributed to other caseworkers, but it was possible some of her inactive files might have ended up in our storage room. So she and I took some time on Friday and looked around for a few hours, and sure enough, stuck in a corner was a box with Becky’s initials on it–‘RB.” Who knows how it got there.

Inside was junk that had been removed from her desk– pens, paper clips, whatever. Underneath all that, was this.”

Her hand shook slightly as she handed me the envelope.

I removed the contents. Three sheets of horizontal-ruled chart paper, slightly grimy and bearing deep fold marks, each partially filled with typed notations.

The first was dated six months ago: Saw DH today. Still hearing vces, but meds seem to hlp. Still dealing w strss of strt-life. Came in with G, both strssd.

BB, SWA Three weeks later: D lots better. Snstv, too. Just meds, or me? Ha ha. Maybe some hope?

BB, SWA Then: D showing feeings, more and more. Tlking lots, too.

Very good! Yeah, thrpy!

Success! But keep limits.

BB, SWA D cohrnt–hr brshed, totally clean! But still late. Talk re childhd, etc. Some p-c, but approp. G there, waiting. A bit hostl?

Jealous? Follow.

BB D a diff prsn. Open, vrbal, affectnt. Still late. A bit more p-c.

Approp? Set lmts? Talk to JJ? Wrth the progrss? Yes!

BB D late, but less–15 min. Some anx. Hrng vcs? Denies, says strss, alchl–drnkng with G. Talked re G, re rel bet D and G. Some anx, defens, but also opn-mind. More p-c, but ok, relieves anx. O.K.

BB D looking lippy. Vry vrbl, no angr, no hrng vcs. G not there.

conflict bet G and D? P-c, tried to kss, no hostile when I say no.

Good!

Approp soc sklls! Rah rah!

The final note was dated three weeks before Becky’s D early–positv change! Yeah! G waits in hall. Definit hostile. Rel bet D and G straind? Re me? D’s growth a stress on G? More p-c. Kss, but quick.

Much affectn. Talk re this. Boundaries, lmts, etc. D a little down, but dealt w it, approp.

BB BB murder: “‘P-c,'” I said, putting the papers down.

“Physical contact,” she said, miserably. “I went over and over it and it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

I reread the notes. “I think you’re right.”

“Hewitt was getting attached to her. Progressively more physical.”

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