“Of course not,” the officer sez, givin’ a little laugh. “This is for your requisition and inventory forms.”
I am likin’ this less and less the more I hear.
“You mean we gotta fill all this out just to move somethin’ in or out of the depot … sir?”
“You misunderstand me, sergeant,” he sez quick-like. “These aren’t the forms themselves.”
I experience a quick flood of relief.
“… These are just the instructions for filling out the forms!”
The relief I had been feelin’ disappears like a single shot of whiskey in a big bowl of watered-down punch.
“The instructions,” I echoes weakly, starin’ at the pile.
All of a sudden this assignment is not lookin’ as good as it had a few minutes ago.
The officer notices the expression on my face.
“Come, come now, sergeant,” he sez, givin’ me what I guess is supposed to be a fatherly smile. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”
“It isn’t?”
“No. It’s really quite simple once you get the hang of it. Just read these instructions all the way through, then follow everything they say to the letter, and everything will be fine.”
“If you say so, sir,” I sez, unconvinced.
“Yes, I do say so … sergeant,” he sez, givin’ up his sales effort. “I told you we were going to get things under control and to do that, proper documentation is vital. It may look like a lot of needless hassle, but believe me, unless all the paperwork for supplies is filled out correctly, the best of armies will bog down and become ineffective.”
“Yes sir. Thank you, sir.”
With that, I salute and get out of his office quick … takin’ the stack of paper with me, of course. All of a sudden, my depression over seein’ the massive list of instructions disappears. Instead, I am feelin’ a degree of optimism I have not felt since the Boss sent us on this assignment without realizin’ what he was doin’, the officer has just made our job a lot easier.