Man in the Iron Mask by Dumas, Alexandre part one

“Yes, Monsieur,” said Mouston.

“Well,” said Porthos, “Mouston fattened so well that he gratified all my hopes by reaching my standard; a fact of which I was well able to convince myself, by seeing the rascal one day in a waistcoat of mine, which he had turned into a coat,- a waistcoat the mere embroidery of which was worth a hundred pistoles.”

“‘Twas only to try it on, Monsieur,” said Mouston.

“From that moment I determined to put Mouston in communication with my tailors, and to have him measured instead of myself.”

“A capital idea, Porthos; but Mouston is a foot and a half shorter than you.”

“Exactly! They measured him down to the ground, and the end of the skirt came just below my knee.”

“What a wonder you are, Porthos! Such a thing could happen only to you.”

“Ah, yes, pay your compliments; there is something upon which to base them! It was exactly at that time- that is to say, nearly two years and a half ago- that I set out for Belle-Isle, instructing Mouston (so as always to have, in every event, a pattern of every fashion) to have a coat made for himself every month.”

“And did Mouston neglect to comply with your instructions? Oh, that would not be right, Mouston!”

“No, Monsieur, quite the contrary, quite the contrary!”

“No, he never forgot to have his coats made; but he forgot to inform me that he had grown stouter!”

“But it was not my fault, Monsieur! Your tailor never told me.”

“And this to such an extent, Monsieur,” continued Porthos, “that the fellow in two years has gained eighteen inches in girth, and so my last dozen coats are all too large in progressive measure from a foot to a foot and a half!”

“But the rest,- those which were made when you were of the same size?”

“They are no longer the fashion, my dear friend. Were I to put them on, I should look like a fresh arrival from Siam, and as though I had been two years away from court.”

“I understand your difficulty. You have how many new suits?- thirty-six, and yet not one to wear. Well, you must have a thirty-seventh made, and give the thirty-six to Mouston.”

“Ah, Monsieur!” said Mouston, with a gratified air. “The truth is, that Monsieur has always been very generous to me.”

“Do you mean to think that I hadn’t that idea, or that I was deterred by the expense? But it wants only two days to the fete. I received the invitation yesterday; made Mouston post hither with my wardrobe, and only this morning discovered my misfortune; and from now till the day after to-morrow, there isn’t a single fashionable tailor who will undertake to make me a suit.”

“That is to say, one covered with gold, isn’t it?”

“I especially wish it so!”

“Oh, we shall manage it! You won’t leave for three days. The invitations are for Wednesday, and this is only Sunday morning.”

“‘Tis true; but Aramis has strongly advised me to be at Vaux twenty-four hours beforehand.”

“How! Aramis?”

“Yes, it was Aramis who brought me the invitation.”

“Ah, to be sure, I see! You are invited on the part of M. Fouquet?”

“By no means,- by the King, dear friend. The letter bears the following as large as life:-

“‘M. le Baron du Vallon is informed that the King has condescended to place him on the invitation list-‘”

“Very good; but you leave with M. Fouquet?”

“And when I think,” cried Porthos, stamping on the floor,- “when I think I shall have no clothes, I am ready to burst with rage! I should like to strangle somebody or destroy something!”

“Neither strangle anybody nor destroy anything, Porthos; I will manage it all. Put on one of your thirty-six suits, and come with me to a tailor.”

“Pooh! my agent has seen them all this morning.”

“Even M. Percerin?”

“Who is M. Percerin?”

“He is the King’s tailor, parbleu!”

“Oh! ah, yes!” said Porthos, who wished to appear to know the King’s tailor, but now heard his name mentioned for the first time; “to M. Percerin’s, by Jove! I thought he would be too much engaged.”

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