through my head like a kaleidoscope, mixing randomly with
my recent thoughts regarding myself.
My search had given me new insight into Aahz. Seeing
MYTH-NOMERS AND IM-PERVECTIONS 195
the dimension that spawned and shaped him, having learned
about his schooldays, and having met his mother, I had a
much clearer picture of what made my old partner tick.
While I was ready to use that information, I resolved never
to let him know how much I had learned. Someday, when
he was ready, he might share some of it with me voluntarily,
but until then I felt it was best to let him think his privacy
was still unbroached. Of course, that still left me groping
for what to say here and now. Should I beg him to come
back with me? Should I play on our friendship … or use
the campaign against Queen Hemlock to lure him back for
just one more job?
Suddenly, Kalvin’s advice came back to me. There was
no right or wrong thing to say. All I could do was try, and
hope that it was good enough to reach my alienated friend.
If not …
Taking a deep breath, I gave it my best shot.
“Mostly, I came to apologize, Aahz.”
“Apologize?”
My words seemed to startle him.
“That’s right. I treated you rather shabbily . . . back
before you left. I’ve got no right to ask you to come back,
but I did want to find you to offer my apology and an
explanation, for what it’s worth. You see …”
Now that I had started, my words poured out in a rush,
popping out without conscious thought on my part.
“I was so afraid in my new position as head of M.Y.T.H.
Inc. that I went overboard trying to live up to what I thought