trading and merchandising hub of the dimensions had gotten
Robert Asprin
me used to seeing beings from numerous dimensions shop-
ping side by side without batting an eye. One tended to
forget that in other dimensions, off-world beings were not
only an oddity, occasionally they were downright unwel-
come.
Of course, Perv was one of those dimensions. What
Massha had noticed while I was gawking at the landscape
was that we were drawing more than a few hostile glares
as passersby noticed us at the mouth of the alley. I had
attributed that to two things: the well-known Pervish temper-
ament (which is notoriously foul), and Massha.
While my apprentice is a wonderful person, her appear-
ance is less than pin-up-girl caliber . . . unless you get
calendars from the local zoo. To say Massha would look
more natural with a few tick-birds walking back and forth
on her would be an injustice . . . she’s never tried to look
natural. This goes beyond her stringy orange hair and larger-
than-large stature. I mean, anyone who wears green lipstick
and turquoise nail polish, not to mention a couple of tattoos
of dubious taste, is not trying for the Miss Natural look.
There was a time when I would get upset at people for
staring at Massha. She really is a wonderful person, even
if her taste in clothes and makeup would gag a goat. I finally
reached peace with it, however, after she pointed out that
she expected people to look at her and dressed accordingly.
All of this is simply to explain why it didn’t strike me
as unusual that people were staring at us. Similarly, Pervish