Over My Dead Body by Rex Stout

“She phoned Miss Lovchen where? Miltan’s?”

“Yes. And she did. Miltan answered the phone himself and recognized her voice and called Miss Lovchen. About a quarter to eleven.”

“What does she say she phoned Miss Lovchen about?”

“She says it’s none of my business.”

Wolfe sighed. “Well, disprove it.”

“Sure. I know. I said frankly, I don’t think she did it.”

“Who do you think did? Miss Lovchen?”

“How the hell do I know?” Cramer sat up and made fists again. “Haven’t I made it plain that I don’t know a damn thing? I can’t even put anyone in that room between ten o’clock, the time that Faber left here on his feet, and the time Goodwin and Miss Tormic went there and found him. We can’t find anyone that saw anybody go in or out of the building. We’re still trying it, but you know that game.”

He banged a fist and demanded, “And what if we do? What if I had stood there on the sidewalk myself and saw her go in with Faber and come out again without him? What good would that do me? When the question comes up, what did she kill him for, or Ludlow either, what do I say then? Huh? Or anybody else! It is customary, before you turn a murder case over to a jury and ask them for a conviction, to give them some slight hint of what the motivation was. They like it better that way. And where it stands now, I could give just as good a motive for Goodwin here, and say he did it with his jackknife when he went there with Miss Tormic, as I could for anybody else.”

I protested, “I don’t carry a jackknife. A penknife.”

“Maybe your field’s too narrow,” Wolfe suggested. “Have you considered –”

“I haven’t got any field. As far as I’m concerned, it’s wide open. Naturally, we’re checking up on everyone that was at Miltan’s last evening. Young Gill was at his office. One out. Miltan and his wife were at their place. Three out. That leaves six in, of that bunch. Driscoll went for a walk at half past ten and got to his office at eleven thirty. Donald Barrett says he was at his office, Barrett & De Russy, but it hasn’t been confirmed yet to make it tight. Lovchen and Tormic and Zorka. Two of those disappeared. Belinda Reade left her apartment shortly after ten o’clock to go shopping and hasn’t been located.”

“The weapon?”

“Hasn’t been found. He was stabbed in the left breast with a blade long enough to reach the heart, and it was withdrawn in a few minutes, but not immediately, judging from the amount of bleeding. He was also struck a severe blow, before he was stabbed, on the left eye. A very hard blow with something blunt and hard and heavy. Very unlikely that he could have got it falling, and anyway, if it had happened at the moment he was stabbed to death it wouldn’t look the way it does. It indicates that there was a struggle – what’s the idea?”

I had doubled up my right fist and displayed it in front of his nose.

“Blunt and hard and heavy,” I declared.

“Huh? What –”

“Yes, sir. It was me. He got obnoxious here in this office and I plugged him. I tell it because you may dig up someone who saw him soon after, and I don’t want to be accused of withholding evidence.”

Cramer’s chin slowly sunk to his breastbone. It looked like a slow motion of Jack Dempsey preparing to wade in. Then, also slowly, he put the tip of a forefinger to his nose and rubbed up and down, gently and rhythmically, meanwhile surveying me through narrowed lids. It was quite a while before he said thoughtfully:

“You wouldn’t stab a guy.”

“No, sir,” I agreed brightly, “it wouldn’t be in character –”

“Shut up. But what if you and Tormic went there and found him there going through things. You got mad and socked him. Tormic got mad and stuck a knife in him. You sent for Durkin and made him a gift of the knife and he left with it. You phoned here and I was here.”

“It sounds pretty plausible,” I conceded, “but you’re confronted with the question of motive again. What was it that infuriated Tormic to the point of croaking him? Another trouble is that Fred Durkin was here in the office when I plugged him.” I shook my head. “That theory is full of holes. I’m in favor of crossing it off –”

The phone interrupted me. It was a call for Cramer. I gave him room to take it at my desk. He talked for a full ten minutes, everything from noncommittal grunts to elaborate detailed instructions, and when it was finished returned to his chair.

He regarded me with a cold eye. “You know, son,” he said finally, “you have one or two good qualities. In a way I even like you. In another way I could stand and watch your hide peeling off and not shed any tears. You have undoubtedly got the goddamnedest nerve of anybody I know except maybe Nero Wolfe. Tormic is down at headquarters, with that lawyer you got for her, refusing to answer questions. I’ve got half a notion to try that old gag on her. I think I’ll phone Rowcliff to tell her that you have admitted that Faber was on his feet when you and she got there, and you knocked him down.”

“Go ahead,” I urged him. “It will be interesting to see how it works out. But as far as my nerve is concerned, I never have had, do not now have, and never will have, enough nerve to risk one teeny-weeny chance of sitting in the frying-chair.”

“Yesterday afternoon you fled the scene of a murder with the weapon used for the crime.”

“Not knowingly. To begin with, I didn’t fled, I merely went. And I did not know that culdymore was in my pocket.”

Cramer leaned back, sighed, and began rubbing his nose again.

The door opened. Fritz entered, approached, and said:

“Mr. Cather, sir.”

Wolfe’s chin went up. “Show him in.”

I could tell from the tone of Wolfe’s voice that there was a possibility that Orrie was bringing home a chunk of important bacon, but a glance at Orrie’s face told me that he didn’t have it. Wolfe obviously reached the same conclusion, for he said, more a statement than a question:

“No result.”

Orrie stood with his overcoat on and his hat in his hand. “No, sir.”

Wolfe grimaced. “Did you find the – things I suggested?”

“Yes, sir. More too. There were mentions – I saw the name – in a lot of articles and sometimes in headlines, but that was all. Of course I couldn’t read –”

“That wouldn’t help any. No pictures.”

“No, sir. I went through every possible thing at the library, and I tried the other places. The Times thought they would have one, but they didn’t. I’m on my way now to the consulate and I just stopped by here instead of phoning –”

“Don’t go to the consulate. I phoned there and it’s hopeless. Mr. Cramer and I are both out of humor with consulates. Have you been to Second Avenue?”

“No, I was going there last.”

“Try it. You might find it there. It is possible that Mr. Cramer has arranged that anyone leaving this house shall be followed. If so, shake him. I don’t want the police in on this. Not yet.”

Orrie grinned. “That will be a pleasure.” He tramped out.

Cramer said in a tone of disgust, “Horse feathers.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time you’ve tried that stratagem,” Wolfe observed mildly. “Anyway, it’s not as annoying as your former attempts at bulldozing. Thank heaven, you seem to have given that up. Are you through amusing yourself with Archie?”

“Amusing myself? Good God!”

“You must have been. You couldn’t very well have been serious. Will you have some beer?”

“No, thanks – yes I will too. I’m thirsty.”

“Good.” Wolfe pushed the button. “Did I understand you to say that you were having Miss Lovchen followed?”

“Yes. A double tail. One of them phoned in at ten forty that she had left the house at 38th Street and gone to Miltan’s, and was in there then, and we haven’t heard from them since. Their instructions are to report in every two hours if they can do so without danger of losing contact.”

“I see. It’s very handy to have so many men.”

“Yeah. It would be if more of them were worth a damn. There are over a hundred of them on this case right now. Sifting out up at 38th Street. Looking for the thing he was stabbed with. Getting backgrounds. Tailing. Looking for Lovchen and Zorka. Checking alibis. I’m expecting any minute to be told to pull a bunch of them off. Hush-hush.” The inspector set his jaw. “But until I get direct orders to the contrary, I’m going to proceed on the theory that the people who pay my salary don’t want any kind of a murderer to get any kind of a break. That’s why I’m sitting here chinning with you. This is the one place where I might get a line on whatever it is that the goddam consuls and ambassadors are so bashful about … much obliged.”

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