Phule looked up. “Both ways? What do you mean?”
“What else would you call a place where your only companion is constantly making remarks that cry out for correction?”
“Where is Captain Jester?” demanded Major Botchup. His tone suggested that anyone who couldn’t answer was in trouble. “Mr. Snipe tells me the fellow’s come sneaking back. Why hasn’t he reported to me?”
“Yes, sir, the captain has returned,” said Armstrong. “His hoverjeep malfunctioned out in the desert, and he walked into camp-“
The new officer grunted. “Malfunctioned, hey? Sounds as if somebody’s slacking off in your motor pool, Lieutenant.” It was clear he considered it Armstrong’s fault.
“Oh, no, sir,” said Armstrong, beginning to sweat. “Our motor pool is up to Legion standards-“
“We’ll see about that, ” said the major. “When the CO’s personal jeep breaks down in the boonies, what kind of attention are the other vehicles getting, I wonder? Omega Company’s not drawing soft barracks duty anymore, Lieutenant. This planet’s at war, you know.”
“Not exactly a war, is it, sir?” said Armstrong meekly. “We were asked in to help the locals find out-“
“Not a war?” the major stopped and turned on his heel to face Armstrong. “That’s naive of you, Lieutenant, wouldn’t you say? These lizards bent over backward to get into the Alliance, and the ink was barely dry on the treaty when they asked for this outfit-which they seem to think is some sort of elite company, God help ’em-to come in as military advisers. What other than a war could be so urgent, hey?”