Phule Me Twice by Robert Asprin & Peter J. Heck

The legionnaires didn’t argue. The group split up as they each headed toward their assigned place. But Flight Leftenant Qual had no assigned place. He watched the others for a moment, then turned and said to Phule, “This is very good, but where does Captain Clown go?”

“First thing I have to do is let Beeker know what’s up so he can get under cover,” said Phule. “If the camp’s on alert, somebody’s likely to pick up the hoverjeep on the sensors and assume he’s a hostile. I’m sure Beek can talk his way out of almost any kind of trouble, but I have a hunch he’d be willing to forgo the added excitement of people shooting at him while he’s doing it.”

“Yes, that would be congruent,” said Qual. “What might I do to assist you?”

“Maybe you can find out where my robot duplicate is,” said Phule. “I ought to reprogram it before anybody figures out there are two of me. And if you can keep the new CO off my back, that’ll be even better.”

“I do not think he will get on your back,” said Qual with his reptilian grin. “But in case he attempts it, I will repel him.”

“Good man,” said Phule absently, and he began trotting toward the MBC. He hadn’t decided exactly what course of action to take, but he knew things would begin falling into place before long. They always did. For now, he just headed for the one place where, unless he was very unlucky, nobody should bother him until he was ready.

Jennie Higgins had not slept well. It wasn’t like her. She’d slept in rougher accommodations on a dozen worlds, out on assignment. It wasn’t even that uncomfortable; hot as the desert air was in full sunlight, it quickly cooled to something quite pleasant at night. There was even a bit of a breeze stirring. And while the desert creatures of this world made sounds unlike the soft night music the flenders and oloxi sang on her home planet, they were hardly the kind of thing to keep her awake. Her cot and sleeping bag were the best money could buy.

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