Phule’s Company by Robert Asprin

“That was another assumption on the reporter’s part. I simply said I was here on ‘a special assignment,’ and she jumped to her own conclusions. As to the quality of our temporary housing … may I speak candidly, Colonel?”

“Please do. If you can clarify the situation without prolonging this rather expensive conversation, it would be appreciated … though from the sound of things, I should have called collect.”

“The remodeling of our quarters, the luxury hotel for temporary housing, and some of the other things you will doubtless be hearing about in the future are all a part of my plan to turn this company around. You see, these people have been treated like losers and been told they’re losers for so long they have little choice but to believe that they’re losers, and they act accordingly. What I’m doing is treating them like they’re the best, like top athletes being groomed for a competition. I’m betting that they’ll respond by acting like winners because they’ll see themselves as winners.”

“The theory being that if they don’t look like soldiers and act like soldiers, how can we expect them to fight like soldiers? You’re betting quite a bit on a theory, Captain.”

“I think it’s a good risk,” Phule said firmly. “And if it isn’t … well, it’s my money to risk, isn’t it?”

“True enough.” Colonel Battleax pursed her lips thoughtfully. “Very well, Captain. I’ll give you your head on this one for a while. If your idea works, the Legion will benefit. If not, we’re no worse off than when we started. Of course, now that your real name is known, if you foul up like you did on your last assignment, it’ll be hard for you to disappear from sight.”

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