Phule’s Paradise by Robert Asprin

“What … you searched my luggage? Before I did anything?”

“Just looking out for the owner’s interests, sir,” the sergeant said.

“But that’s … that’s …”

“Illegal? Quite right, sir. It would seem that you’re not the only crook on Lorelei, but, of course, you already knew that. The real trick, sir, is not getting caught. Now, if you’ll step this way?”

Sprawled at a table near the open front of one of the casino’s cocktail lounges, Doc and Tiffany watched the procession march past.

“You know,” Doc said, “that actually looks like it would be fun. Maybe I should put in a request to stand regular duty once in a while. If nothing else, it would justify wearing these uniforms all the time.”

The actress made a face as she sipped her drink.

“It’s got to be more fun than troweling makeup onto Dee Dee the Dip five times a day,” she said. “Wouldn’t you know that, after making that big fuss about not wanting a live stage crew, now the computer’s been dry-cleaned, she’s insisting we keep working the shows?”

“All I have to do is work the curtains,” Doc said, “but I know what you mean. Still, I suppose it’s closer to show business than standing around watching drunks lose money day in and day out.”

“Maybe for you, Doc, but you’re used to working behind the scenes. For someone like me who’s used to being in view in some capacity or other, working support is a real comedown. At least standing guard would be role-playing of sorts.”

The stuntman cocked an eyebrow at her. “You sound kinda down, Tiff. Anything bothering you?”

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