There were steps on the stairs, and Saul’s voice came from the door. “Let me out, Archie. I’ve got work to do,”
“Let yourself out. What are you afraid of?”
I stuck my hands in my pockets and stretched out my legs and sat on my shoulder blades and scowled. Ten minutes after Saul had left the phone rang. I uttered a couple of expletives as I reached for it, thinking it was one of the pack with another howl, but Saul Panzer’s voice was in my ear. “Archie? Connect me with Mr. Wolfe.”
I thought, now that was quick work, and plugged and buzzed. Wolfe’s voice sounded. “Nero Wolfe.”
“Yes, sir. This is Saul. I’m ready.”
“Good. Archie? You don’t need to take this.”
I hung up with a bang and a snort. My powers of dissimulation were being saved from strain again. But that kind of thing didn’t really get me sore, for I knew perfectly well why Wolfe didn’t always point out to me the hole he was getting ready to crawl through: he knew that half the time I’d be back at him with damn good proof that it couldn’t he done, which would only have been a nuisance, since he intended to do it anyway. No guy who knows he’s right because he’s too conceited to be wrong can be expected to go into conference about it.
Five minutes after that phone call from Saul the fun began. I got a ring from Wolfe upstairs. “Try for Lord Clivers.”
I got the Hotel Portland and got through to him, and Wolfe spoke. “Good morning, sir. I received your message… Yes, so I understand… No, he can’t go…If you will be so good-one moment-a very important development has taken place, and I don’t like to discuss details on the telephone. You may remember that on the phone yesterday afternoon Mr. Walsh spoke to you regarding a certain person whom he had just seen…. Yes, he is both dangerous and desperate; moreover, he is cornered, and there is only one course open to you that can possibly prevent the fullest and most distasteful publicity on the whole affair…. I know that, that’s why I want you to come to my office at once…. No, sir, take my word for it, it won’t do, I should have to expose him immediately and publicly…. Yes, sir…. Good. That’s a sensible man. Be sure to bring those papers along. I’ll expect you in fifteen minutes….”
Clivers rang off, but Wolfe stayed on.
“Archie. Try for Mr. Muir.”
I got the Seaboard Products Corporation, and Miss Barish, and then Muir, and buzzed Wolfe.
“Mr. Muir? Good morning, sir. This is Nero Wolfe…. One moment, sir, I beg you. I have learned, to my great discomfiture, that I did an act of injustice yesterday, and I wish to rectify it…. Yes, yes, quite so, I understand…. Yes, indeed. I prefer not to discuss it on the telephone, but I am sure you will find yourself as satisfied as you deserve to be if you will come to my office at half past eleven this morning, and bring Mr. Perry with you…. No, I’m sorry, I can’t do that. Miss Fox will be here…. Yes, she is here now…. No, half past eleven, not before, and it will be necessary to have Mr. Perry present…. Oh, surely not, he has shown a most active interest…. Yes, it’s only a short distance….”
I heard Muir’s click off, and said into my transmitter, “That will bring that old goat trotting up here without stopping either for Perry or his hat. Why didn’t you-”
“Thanks, Archie. Try for Mr. Cramer.”
I got headquarters, and Cramer’s extension and his clerk. Then the inspector. Wolfe got on. “Good morning, Mr. Cramer… Yes, indeed, I received your messages, but I have been occupied to good purpose…. So I understand, but could I help that? Can you be at my office at half past eleven? I shall be ready for you at that time…. The fact is, I do not intend merely to give you information, I hope to deliver a finished case…. I can’t help that either; do you think I have the Moerae running errands for me?… Certainly, if they wish to come, bring them, though I think it would be well if Mr. Hombert went back to diapers…. Yes, eleven-thirty….”
Cramer was off. I said, “Shall I try for the Cabinet?”
“No, thanks.” Wolfe was purring. “When Lord Clivers arrives, bring him up here at once.”
XVII
I LET Saul Panzer in when he came. There was no longer any reason why I shouldn’t relinquish the job of answering the door, which normally belonged to Fritz, but it seemed tactful to give him time to cool off a little; and besides, if I left him to his own devices in the kitchen a while longer without interruption, there was a chance that he would bounce a stewpan on Johnny’s bean, which would have done them both good.
So I let Saul in and parked him in the front room, and also, a little later, I opened up for the Marquis of Clivers. Whereupon I experienced a delightful surprise, for he had his nephew along. Apparently there was no wedding on today; Horrocks looked sturdy and wholesome in a sack suit that hung like a dream, and I got so interested looking at it that I almost forgot it was him inside of it. I suggested him toward the office and said to Clivers, “Mr. Wolfe would like to see you upstairs. Three flights. Climb, or elevator?”
He was looking concentrated and sour. He said climb, and I took him up to the plant rooms and showed him Wolfe and left him there.
When I got back down Horrocks was still standing in the hall.
“If you want to wait,” I said, “there’s a place in the office to hold the back of your lap. You know, chair.”
“The back of my lap?” He stared, and by gum, he worked at it till he got it. “Oh, quite. Thanks awfully. But I… I say, you know, Miss Fox got quite a wetting. Didn’t she?”
“Yeah, she was good and damp.”
“And I suppose she is still here, what?”
It was merely a question of which would be less irritating, to let him go on and circle around it for a while, or cut the knot for him and hand him the pieces. Deciding for the latter, I said, “Wait here,” and mounted the stairs again. They seemed to have quieted down in the south room.
I knocked and went in and told Clara Fox, “That young diplomat is down below and wants to see you and I’m going to send him up. Keep him in here. We’re going to be busy in the office, and it gives me the spirit of seventy-six to look at him.”
She made a dive for her vanity case, and I descended to the hall again and told Horrocks he knew the way.
It was ten after eleven. There was nothing for me to do but sit down and suck my finger. There was one thing I would have liked to remind Wolfe of before the party began, but I didn’t myself know bow important it was, and anyway I had no idea how he intended to stage it. There was even a chance that this was to be only a dress rehearsal, a preliminary, to see what a litde panic would do, but that wouldn’t be like him. The only hint he condescended to give me was to ring me on the house phone and tell me he would come down with Clivers after the others had arrived, and until then I was to say nothing of Clivers’ presence. I went in to see if Saul was talking, but he wasn’t, so I went back and sat down and felt my pulse.
The two contingents, official and Seaboard, showed up within three minutes of each other. I let them in. The official came first. I took them to the office, where I had chairs pulled up. Skinner looked bilious, Hombert harassed, and Cramer moderately grim. When they saw Wolfe wasn’t in the office they started to get exasperated, but I silenced them with a few well chosen phrases, and then the bell rang again and I went for the second batch.
Muir and Perry were together. Perry smiled a tight smile at me and told me good morning, but Muir wasn’t having any amenities; I saw his hand tremble a little as he hung his hat up, and he could have gone from that right on into permanent palsy without any tears wasted as far as I was concemed. I nodded them ahead.
They stopped dead inside the office door, at sight of the trio already there. Muir looked astonished and furious; Perry seemed surprised, looking from one to the other, and then turned to me. “I thought… Wolfe said eleven-thirty, so I understood from Muir… if these gentlemen…”