‘But he’s a midget!’ shouted Mr Teavee.
‘Mike,’ cried Mrs Teavee, ‘are you all right? Are there any bits of you missing?’
‘Isn’t he going to get any bigger?’ shouted Mr Teavee.
‘Talk to me, Mike!’ cried Mrs Teavee. ‘Say something! Tell me you’re all right!’
A tiny little voice, no louder than the squeaking of a mouse, came out of the television set. ‘Hi, Mum!’ it said. ‘Hi, Pop! Look at me! I’m the first person ever to be sent by television!’
‘Grab him!’ ordered Mr Wonka. ‘Quick!’
Mrs Teavee shot out a hand and picked the tiny figure of Mike Teavee out of the screen.
‘Hooray!’ cried Mr Wonka. ‘He’s all in one piece! He’s completely unharmed!’
‘You call that unharmed?’ snapped Mrs Teavee, peering at the little speck of a boy who was now running to and fro across the palm of her hand, waving his pistols in the air.
He was certainly not more than an inch tall.
‘He’s shrunk!’ said Mr Teavee.
‘Of course he’s shrunk,’ said Mr Wonka. ‘What did you expect?’
‘This is terrible!’ wailed Mrs Teavee. ‘What are we going to do?’
And Mr Teavee said, ‘We can’t send him back to school like this! He’ll get trodden on! He’ll get squashed!’
‘He won’t be able to do anything!’ cried Mrs Teavee.
‘Oh, yes I will!’ squeaked the tiny voice of Mike Teavee. ‘I’ll still be able to watch television!’
‘Never again!’ shouted Mr Teavee. ‘I’m throwing the television set right out the window the moment we get home. I’ve had enough of television!’
When he heard this, Mike Teavee flew into a terrible tantrum. He started jumping up and down on the palm of his mother’s hand, screaming and yelling and trying to bite her fingers. ‘I want to watch television!’ he squeaked. ‘I want to watch television! I want to watch television! I want to watch television!’
‘Here! Give him to me!’ said Mr Teavee, and he took the tiny boy and shoved him into the breast pocket of his jacket and stuffed a handkerchief on top. Squeals and yells came from inside the pocket, and the pocket shook as the furious little prisoner fought to get out.
‘Oh, Mr Wonka,’ wailed Mrs Teavee, ‘how can we make him grow?’
‘Well,’ said Mr Wonka, stroking his beard and gazing thoughtfully at the ceiling, ‘I must say that’s a wee bit tricky. But small boys are extremely springy and elastic. They stretch like mad. So what we’ll do, we’ll put him in a special machine I have for testing the stretchiness of chewing-gum! Maybe that will bring him back to what he was.’
‘Oh, thank you!’ said Mrs Teavee.
‘Don’t mention it, dear lady.’
‘How far d’you think he’ll stretch?’ asked Mr Teavee.
‘Maybe miles,’ said Mr Wonka. ‘Who knows? But he’s going to be awfully thin. Everything gets thinner when you stretch it.’
‘You mean like chewing-gum?’ asked Mr Teavee.
‘Exactly.’
‘How thin will he be?’ asked Mrs Teavee anxiously.
‘I haven’t the foggiest idea,’ said Mr Wonka. ‘And it doesn’t really matter, anyway, because we’ll soon fatten him up again. All we’ll have to do is give him a triple overdose of my wonderful Supervitamin Chocolate. Supervitamin Chocolate contains huge amounts of vitamin A and vitamin B. It also contains vitamin C, vitamin D, vitamin E, vitamin F, vitamin G, vitamin I, vitamin J, vitamin K, vitamin L, vitamin M, vitamin N, vitamin O, vitamin P, vitamin Q, vitamin R, vitamin T, vitamin U, vitamin V, vitamin W, vitamin X, vitamin Y, and, believe it or not, vitamin Z! The only two vitamins it doesn’t have in it are vitamin S, because it makes you sick, and vitamin H, because it makes you grow horns on the top of your head, like a bull. But it does have in it a very small amount of the rarest and most magical vitamin of them all — vitamin Wonka.’
‘And what will that do to him?’ asked Mr Teavee anxiously.
‘It’ll make his toes grow out until they’re as long as his fingers . . .’
‘Oh, no!’ cried Mrs Teavee.
‘Don’t be silly,’ said Mr Wonka. ‘It’s most useful. He’ll be able to play the piano with his feet.’