“What of Bleys?” Random inquired.
“He sends things out of the Shadows, and Eric is greatly disturbed. But he has never attacked with his real force, and so Eric is troubled, and the disposition of the Crown and Scepter remains uncertain, though Eric holds the one in his right hand.”
“I see. Has he ever spoken of us?”
“Not of you, Random. But of Corwin, yes. He still fears the return of Corwin to Amber. There is relative safety for perhaps five more miles—but beyond that, every step of the way is studded with peril. Every tree and rock is a booby trap and an ambush. Because of Bleys and because of Corwin. He wanted you to get at least this far, so that you could not work with Shadows nor easily escape his power. It is absolutely impossible for either of you to enter into Amber without falling into one of his traps.”
“Yet you escaped….”
“That was different. I was trying to get out, not in. Perhaps he did not guard me so carefully as he would one of you, because of my sex and my lack of ambition. And nevertheless, as you can see, I did not succeed.”
“You have now, sister,” I said, “so long as my blade is free to swing on your behalf,” and she kissed my brow and squeezed my hand. I was always a sucker for that.
“I’m sure we’re being followed,” said Random, and with a gesture the three of us faded into the darkness.
We lay still beneath a bush, keeping watch on our trail.
After a time, our whispers indicated that there was a decision for me to make. The question was really quite simple: What next?
The question was too basic, and I couldn’t stall any more. I knew I couldn’t trust them, even dear Deirdre, but if I had to level with anybody, Random was at least in this thing with me, up to his neck, and Deirdre was my favorite.
“Beloved relatives,” I told them, “I’ve a confession to make,” and Random’s hand was already on the hilt of his blade. That’s how far we could trust one another. I could already hear his mind clicking: Corwin brought me here to betray me, he was saying to himself.
“If you brought me here to betray me,” be said, “you won’t take me back alive.”
“Are you kidding?” I asked. “I want your help, not your head. What I have to say is just this: I don’t know what the hell’s going on. I’ve made some guesses, but I don’t really know where the devil we are, what Amber is, or why we’re crouched here in the bushes hiding from his troops,” I told him, “or for that matter, who I am, really.”
There was an awfully long silence, and then Random whispered, “What do you mean?”
“Yes,” said Deirdre.
“I mean,” I said, “that I managed to fool you, Random. Didn’t you think it strange that all I did on this trip was drive the car?”
“You were the boss,” he told me, “and I figured you were planning. You did some pretty shrewd things along the way. I know that you’re Corwin.”
“Which is a thing I only found out a couple of days ago, myself,” I said. “I know that I am the one you call Corwin, but I was in an accident a while back. I had head injuries—I’ll show you the scars when we’ve got more light—and I am suffering from amnesia. I don’t dig all this talk about Shadows. I don’t even remember much about Amber. All I remember is my relatives, and the fact that I can’t trust them much. That’s my story. What’s to be done about it?”
“Christ!” said Random. “Yes, I can see it now! I understand all the little things that puzzled me along the way. How did you take Flora in so completely?”
“Luck,” I said, “and subconscious sneakiness, I guess. No! That’s not it! She was stupid. Now I really need you, though.”
“Do you think we can make it into the Shadows,” said Deirdre, and she was not speaking to me.
“Yes,” said Random, “but I’m not for it. I’d like to see Corwin in Amber, and I’d like to see Eric’s head on a pole. I’m willing to take a few chances to see these things, so I’m not turning back to the Shadows. You can if you want. You all think I’m a weakling and a bluff. Now you’re going to find out. I’m going to see this through.”