I wondered at the popular reaction, but could not guess.
When the darkness reached as far as Amber, however, I knew that Eric would have his regrets. This much I knew, and this comforted me.
Thus began my days of darkness, and I had no way of measuring their passage. Even if I had had eyes, I could not have distinguished day from night in that place.
Time went on its way, ignoring me. There were occasions when I broke into a sweat over this and shivered. Had I been there months? Only hours? Or weeks? Or had it been years?
I forgot all about time. I slept, I paced (I knew exactly where to place my feet and when to turn), and I reflected upon things I had done and hadn’t done. Sometimes I would sit cross-legged and breathe slowly and deeply, and empty my mind and keep it that way for as long as I could. This helped—thinking of nothing.
Eric had been clever. Although the power lived within me, now it was useless. A blind man cannot walk among Shadows.
My beard had grown down to my chest and my hair was long. I was always hungry at first, but after a time my appetite waned. Sometimes I grew dizzy when I stood up too rapidly.
I could still see, in my nightmares, but this hurt me even more when I awakened.
Later, though, I felt somewhat distant from the events which had led up to this. It was almost as though they had happened to a different person. And this, too, was true.
I had lost a lot of weight. I could visualize myself, pallid and thin. I couldn’t even cry, though I felt like it a couple of times. There was something wrong with my tear ducts. It was a dreadful thing that any man should be brought to this.
Then one day there came a light scratching upon the door. I ignored it.
It came again, and still I did not respond.
Then I heard my name whispered, in the interrogative.
I crossed the cell.
“Yes?” I replied.
“It’s me, Rein,” he said. “How are you?”
I laughed at that.
“Fine! Oh just fine!” I said. “Steak and champagne every night, and dancing girls. God! You should make the scene sometime!”
“I’m sorry,” he said, “that there is nothing I can do for you,” and I could feel the pain in his voice.
“I know.” I said.
“I would if I could,” he told me.
“I know that, too.”
“I brought you something. Here.”
The little gate at the bottom of the cell door creaked slightly as it swung inward several times.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Some clean clothes,” he said, “and three loaves of fresh bread, a head of cheese, some beef, two bottles of wine, a carton of cigarettes, and a lot of matches.”
My voice caught in my throat.
“Thanks, Rein. You’re all right. How did you arrange this?”
“I know the guard who’s standing duty this shift. He won’t talk. He owes me too much.”
“He might try to cancel his debts by squealing,” I said. “So don’t do it again—much as I appreciate it. Needless to say, I’ll dispose of the evidence.”
“I wish it had turned out different, Corwin.”
“You and me both. Thanks for thinking of me when you were ordered not to.”
“That part was easy.” he said.
“How long have I been in this place?”
“Four months and ten days,” he said.
“So what’s new in Amber?”
“Erie reigns. That’s all.”
“Where’s Julian?”
“Back in the Forest of Arden with his guard.”
“Why?”
“Some strange things made it through Shadow recently.”
“I see. How about Caine?”
“He’s still in Amber, enjoying himself. Wenching and drinking, mostly.”
“And Gerard?”
“He’s admiral of the entire fleet.”
I sighed with a bit of relief. I was afraid his withdrawal during the naval engagement might have cost him something with Eric.
“And what of Random?”
“He’s up the hall aways.”
“What? He was taken?”
“Yes. He walked the Pattern in Rebma and showed up here, with a crossbow. He wounded Eric before he was taken.”
“Really? Why wasn’t he slain?”