“Avalon? Then you lied when you said it was destroyed?”
I shook my head.
“Not so. Our Avalon fell, but in Shadow I may find its like once more.”
“Take me with you.”
“Are you mad?”
“No, I would look once again on the land of my birth, no matter what the peril.”
“I do not go to dwell there,” I said, “but to arm for battle. In Avalon there is a pink powder the jewelers use. I ignited a sample of it one time in Amber. I go there only to obtain it and to build guns that I may lay siege to Amber and gain the throne that is mine.”
“What. of those things from beyond Shadow you spoke of.”
“I will deal with them afterwards. Should I lose this time, then they are Eric‘s problem.”
“You said that he had blinded you and cast you into the dungeons.”
“That is true. I grew new eyes. I escaped.”
“You are a demon.”
“This has often been said. I no longer deny it.”
“You will take me with you?”
“If you really wish to come. It will differ from the Avalon you knew, however.”
“To Amber!”
“You are mad!”
“No. Long have I wished to look upon that fabled city. After I have seen Avalon once again I will want to turn my hand to something new. Was I not a good general?”
“Yes.”
“Then you will teach me of these things you call guns, and I will help you in the greatest battle. I‘ve not too many good years remaining before me, I know. Take me with you.”
“Your bones may bleach at the foot of Kolvir, beside my own.”
“What battle is certain? I will chance it”
“As you would. You may come.”
“Thank you. Lord.”
We camped there that night, rode back to the keep in the morning. Then I sought after Lorraine. I learned that she had run off with one other former lovers, an officer named Melkin. Although she had been upset, I resented the fact that she had not given me the opportunity to explain something of which she only knew rumors. I decided to follow them.
I mounted Star, turned my stiff neck in the direction they had supposedly taken, and rode on after. In a way, I could not blame her. I had not been received back at the keep as the slayer of the horned one might have been were he anyone else. The stories of their Corwin lingered on, and the demon tag was on all of them. The men I had worked with, fought beside, now looked at me with glances holding something more than fear—glances only, for they quickly dropped their eyes or turned them to another thing. Perhaps they feared that I wished to stay and reign over them. They might have been relieved, all save Ganelon, when I took to the trail. Ganelon, I think, feared that I would not return for him as I had promised. This, I feel, is the reason that he offered to ride with me. But it was a thing that I had to do by myself.
Lorraine had come to mean something to me, I was surprised to discover, and I found myself quite hurt by her action. I felt that she owed me a hearing before she went her way. Then if she still chose her mortal captain, they could have my blessing. If not, I realized that I wanted to keep her with me. Fair Avalon would be postponed for so long as it took me to resolve this to ending or continuance.
I rode along the trail and the birds sang in the trees about me. The day was bright with a sky-blue, tree-green peace, for the scourge had been lifted from the land. In my heart, there was something like a bit of joy that I had undone at least a small portion of the rottenness I had wrought. Evil? Hell, I‘ve done more of it than most men, but I had picked up a conscience too, somewhere along the way, and I let it enjoy one of its rare moments of satisfaction. Once I held Amber, I could allow it a little more leeway, I felt. Ha!