despising him for his want of courage. I don’t know how others
feel, but, to me, love isn’t all. I must look up, not down, trust and
honor with my whole heart, and find strength and integrity to lean
on. I have had it so far, and I know I could not live without it.?
“Your ideal is a high one. Do you hope to find it, Rose?” Mac
asked, feeling, with the humility of a genuine love, that he could
not give her all she desired.
“Yes,” she answered, with a face full of the beautiful confidence in
virtue, the instinctive desire for the best which so many of us lose
too soon, to find again after life’s great lessons are well learned. “I
do hope to find it, because I try not to be unreasonable and expect
perfection. Smile if you will, but I won’t give up my hero yet,” and
she tried to speak lightly, hoping to lead him away from a more
dangerous topic.
“You’ll have to look a long while, I’m afraid,” and all the glow was
gone out of Mac’s face, for he understood her wish and knew his
answer had been given.
“I have Uncle to help me, and I think my ideal grew out of my
knowledge of him. How can I fail to believe in goodness, when he
shows me what it can be and do??
“It’s no use for me to say any more, for I have very little to offer. I
did not mean to say a word till I earned a right to hope for
something in return. I cannot take it back, but I can wish you
success, and I do, because you deserve the very best.” And Mac
moved as if he was going away without more words, accepting the
inevitable as manfully as he could.
“Thank you that makes me feel very ungrateful and unkind. I wish
I could answer you as you want me to for, indeed, dear Mac, I’m
very fond of you in my own way,” and Rose looked up with such
tender pity and frank affection in her face, it was no wonder the
poor fellow caught at a ray of hope and, brightening suddenly, said
in his own odd way: “Couldn’t you take me on trial while you are
waiting for a true hero? It may be years before you find him;
meantime, you could be practicing on me in ways that would be
useful when you get him.?
“Oh, Mac! What shall I do with you?” exclaimed Rose, so
curiously affected by this very characteristic wooing that she did
not know whether to laugh or cry, for he was looking at her with
his heart in his eyes, though his proposition was the queerest ever
made at such a time.
“Just go on being fond of me in your own way, and let me love you
as much as I like in mine. I’ll try to be satisfied with that.” And he
took both her hands so beseechingly that she felt more ungrateful
than ever.
“No, it would not be fair, for you would love the most and, if the
hero did appear, what would become of you??
“I should resemble Uncle Alec in one thing at least fidelity, for my
first love would be my last.?
That went straight to Rose’s heart, and for a minute she stood
silent, looking down at the two strong hands that held hers so
firmly yet so gently, and the thought went through her mind, “Must
he, too, be solitary all his life? I have no dear lover as my mother
had, why cannot I make him happy and forget myself??
It did not seem very hard, and she owned that, even while she told
herself that compassion was no equivalent for love. She wanted to
give all she could, and keep as much of Mac’s affection as she
honestly might, because it seemed to grow more sweet and
precious when she thought of putting it away.
“You will be like Uncle in happier ways than that, I hope, for you,
too, must have a high ideal and find her and be happy,” she said,