believe you have nothing else to offer.”
“Sir, I am poor, I grant you. But is fame nothing? The Hon. Bellamy
Foodle of Arkansas says that my new statue of America, is a clever piece
of sculpture, and he is satisfied that my name will one day be famous.”
“Bosh! What does that Arkansas ass know about it? Fame’s nothing–the
market price of your marble scarecrow is the thing to look at. It took
you six months to chisel it, and you can’t sell it for a hundred dollars.
No, sir! Show me fifty thousand dollars and you can have my daughter–
otherwise she marries young Simper. You have just six months to raise
the money in. Good morning, sir.”
“Alas! Woe is me!”
CHAPTER III
[ Scene-The Studio.]
“Oh, John, friend of my boyhood, I am the unhappiest of men.”
“You’re a simpleton!”
“I have nothing left to love but my poor statue of America–and see, even
she has no sympathy for me in her cold marble countenance–so beautiful
and so heartless!”
“You’re a dummy!”
“Oh, John!”
Oh, fudge! Didn’t you say you had six months to raise the money in?”
“Don’t deride my agony, John. If I had six centuries what good would it
do? How could it help a poor wretch without name, capital, or friends?”
“Idiot! Coward! Baby! Six months to raise the money in–and five will
do!”
“Are you insane?”
“Six months–an abundance. Leave it to me. I’ll raise it.”
“What do you mean, John? How on earth can you raise such a monstrous sum
for me?”
“Will you let that be my business, and not meddle? Will you leave the
thing in my hands? Will you swear to submit to whatever I do? Will you
pledge me to find no fault with my actions?”
“I am dizzy–bewildered–but I swear.”
John took up a hammer and deliberately smashed the nose of America! He
made another pass and two of her fingers fell to the floor–another, and
part of an ear came away–another, and a row of toes was mangled and
dismembered–another, and the left leg, from the knee down, lay a
fragmentary ruin!
John put on his hat and departed.
George gazed speechless upon the battered and grotesque nightmare before
him for the space of thirty seconds, and then wilted to the floor and
went into convulsions.
John returned presently with a carriage, got the broken-hearted artist
and the broken-legged statue aboard, and drove off, whistling low and
tranquilly.
He left the artist at his lodgings, and drove off and disappeared down
the Via Quirinalis with the statue.
CHAPTER IV
[Scene–The Studio.]
“The six months will be up at two o’clock to-day! Oh, agony! My life is
blighted. I would that I were dead. I had no supper yesterday. I have
had no breakfast to-day. I dare not enter an eating-house. And hungry?
–don’t mention it! My bootmaker duns me to death–my tailor duns me–
my landlord haunts me. I am miserable. I haven’t seen John since that
awful day. She smiles on me tenderly when we meet in the great
thoroughfares, but her old flint of a father makes her look in the other
direction in short order. Now who is knocking at that door? Who is come
to persecute me? That malignant villain the bootmaker, I’ll warrant.
Come in!”
“Ah, happiness attend your highness–Heaven be propitious to your grace!
I have brought my lord’s new boots–ah, say nothing about the pay, there
is no hurry, none in the world. Shall be proud if my noble lord will
continue to honor me with his custom–ah, adieu!”
“Brought the boots himself! Don’t wait his pay! Takes his leave with a
bow and a scrape fit to honor majesty withal! Desires a continuance of
my custom! Is the world coming to an end? Of all the–come in!”
“Pardon, signore, but I have brought your new suit of clothes for–”
“Come in!”
“A thousand pardons for this intrusion, your worship. But I have
prepared the beautiful suite of rooms below for you–this wretched den is
but ill suited to–”
“Come in!”
“I have called to say that your credit at our bank, some time since
unfortunately interrupted, is entirely and most satisfactorily restored,