Spellsinger 03 – The Day of the Dissonance by Foster, Alan Dean

“Eat,” she informed him. “Talk more later.”

“Well now, I could do with a spot o’ breakfast!” Mudge

tried to muster some enthusiasm. Maybe Jon-Tom was right

after all, and these cute little enchanted bastards were finally

going to act in a civilized manner. “Where do we eat?”

“Wrong pronoun,” Grelgen said. She turned to point

with her wand.

Jon-Tom followed it into the brush. What the poor light

of evening had kept hidden from view was now revealed

by the bright light of day. Up the creek beyond the town,

thick peeled branches spanned a shallow excavation. The

firepit showed signs of recent use.

Mudge saw it, too, and his initial enthusiasm vanished.

“Uh, wot’s on the menu, luv?”

“Fricasseed water rat,” she told him, with relish.

“Wot, me?” Mudge squeaked.

“Give the main course a bottle of elf dust. What better

end for a guilty assassin?”

Up till now Jon-Tom had considered their predicament

as nothing more than a matter of bad communication. This

new vision of a bunch of carnivorous fairies feasting on

Mudge’s well-done carcass shoved everything over the

edge into the realm of the surreal.

“Listen, you can’t eat any of us.”

Grelgen rested pudgy hands on soft hips. “Why not?

Jon-Tom struggled for a sensible reply. “Well, for one

thing, it just doesn’t fit your image.”

She squinted sideways at him. “You,” she said decisively,

“are nuts. I’m going to have to consult with the Elders to

make sure it’s okay to eat crazy people.”

“I mean, it just doesn’t seem right. What about your

honey rolls and custards and like that?”

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