“Just be cool and let me do the talking,” he said out of the corner of his mouth.
“Yes, all right.”
“Eddie!” Andy cried. “Tian Jaffords! How good to see you both! And weapons to use against the Wolves!
My! Where are they?”
“Stacked in the shithouse,” Eddie said. “We can get a wagon down here once they’re out, but they’re heavy…
and there isn’t much room to move around in there…”
He stood aside. Andy came on. His eyes were flashing, but not in laughter now. They were so brilliant Eddie had to squint— it was like looking at flashbulbs.
“I’m sure I can get them out,” Andy said. “How good it is to help! How often I’ve regretted how little my programming allows me to…”
He was standing in the privy door now, bent slightly at the thighs to get his metallic barrel of a head below the level of the jamb. Eddie drew Roland’s gun. As always, the sandalwood grip felt smooth and eager against his palm.
“Cry your pardon, Eddie of New York, but I see no guns.”
“No,” Eddie agreed. “Me either. Actually all I see is a fucking traitor who teaches songs to the kids and then sends them to be—”
Andy turned with terrible liquid speed. To Eddie’s ears the hum of the servos in his neck seemed very loud.
They were standing less than three feet apart, point-blank range. “May it do ya fine, you stainless-steel bastard,” Eddie said, and fired twice. The reports were deafening in the evening stillness. Andy’s eyes exploded and went dark. Tian cried out.
” NO!”Andy screamed in an amplified voice. It was so loud that it made the gunshots seem no more than popping corks by comparison. ” NO, MY EYES, I CAN’T SEE, OH NO, VISION ZERO, MY EYES, MY EYES
—”
The scrawny stainless-steel arms flew up to the shattered sockets, where blue sparks were now jumping erratically. Andy’s legs straightened, and his barrel of a head ripped through the top of the privy’s doorway, throwing chunks of board left and right.
“NO, NO, NO, I CAN’T SEE, VISION ZERO, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME, AMBUSH, ATTACK, I’M
BLIND, CODE 7, CODE 7, CODE 7!”
“Help me push him, Tian!” Eddie shouted, dropping the gun back into its holster. But Tian was frozen, gawking at the robot (whose head had now vanished inside the broken doorway), and Eddie had no time to wait. He lunged forward and planted his outstretched palms on the plate giving Andy’s name, function, and serial number. The robot was amazingly heavy (Eddie’s first thought was that it was like pushing a parking garage), but it was also blind, surprised, and off-balance. It stumbled backward, and suddenly the amplified words cut off. What replaced them was an unearthly shrieking siren. Eddie thought it would split his head.
He grabbed the door and swung it shut. There was a huge, ragged gap at the top, but the door still closed flush. Eddie ran the new bolt, which was as thick as his wrist.
From within the privy, the siren shrieked and warbled.
Rosa came running with a plate in both hands. Her eyes were huge. “What is it? In the name of God and the Man Jesus, what is it?”
Before Eddie could answer, a tremendous blow shook the privy on its foundations. It actually moved to the right, disclosing the edge of the hole beneath it.
“It’s Andy,” he said. “I think he just pulled up a horoscope he doesn’t much care f—”
” YOU BASTARDS!” This voice was totally unlike Andy’s usual three forms of address: smarmy, self-satisfied, or falsely subservient. ” YOU BASTARDS! COZENING BASTARDS! I’LL KILL YOU I’M BLIND, OH, I’M
BLIND, CODE 7! CODE 7!” The words ceased and the siren recommenced. Rosa dropped her plates and clapped her hands over her ears.
Another blow slammed against the side of the privy, and this time two of the stout boards bowed outward.
The next one broke them. Andy’s arm flashed through, gleaming red in the light, the four jointed fingers at the end opening and closing spasmodically. In the distance, Eddie could hear the crazy barking of dogs.
“He’s going to get out, Eddie!” Tian shouted, grabbing Eddie’s shoulder. “He’s going to get out!”
Eddie shook the hand off and stepped to the door. There was another crashing blow. More broken boards popped off the side of the privy. The lawn was scattered with them now. But he couldn’t shout against the wail of the siren, it was just too loud. He waited, and before Andy hammered the side of the privy again, it cut off.
” BASTARDS!” Andy screamed. ” I’LL KILL YOU! DIRECTIVE 20, CODE 7! I’M BLIND, ZERO VISION, YOU COWARDLY—”
“Andy, Messenger Robot!” Eddie shouted. He had jotted the serial number on one of Callahan’s precious scraps of paper, with Callahan’s stub of pencil, and now he read it off. “DNF-44821-V-63! Password!”
The frenzied blows and amplified shouting ceased as soon as Eddie finished giving the serial number, yet even the silence wasn’t silent; his ears still rang with the hellish shriek of the siren. There was a clank of metal and the click of relays. Then: “This is DNF-44821-V-63. Please give password.” A pause, and then, tonelessly: “You ambushing bastard Eddie Dean of New York. You have ten seconds. Nine…”
“Nineteen,” Eddie said through the door.
“Incorrect password.” And, tin man or not, there was no mistaking the furious pleasure in Andy’s voice.
“Eight… seven…”
“Ninety-nine.”
“Incorrect password.” Now what Eddie heard was triumph. He had time to regret his insane cockiness out on the road. Time to see the look of terror which passed between Rosa and Tian. Time to realize the dogs were still barking.
“Five… four…”
Not nineteen; not ninety-nine. What else was there? What in the name of Christ turned the bastard off?
“… three…”
What flashed into his mind, as bright as Andy’s eyes had been before Roland’s big revolver turned them dark, was the verse scrawled on the fence around the vacant lot, spray-painted in dusty rose-pink letters: Oh SUSANNAH-MIO, divided girl of mine, Done parked her RIG in the DIXIE PIG, in the year of—
“… two…”
Not one or the other; both. Which was why the damned robot hadn’t cut him off after a single incorrect try.
He hadn’t been incorrect, not exactly.
” Nineteen-ninety-nine!”‘Eddie screamed through the door.
From behind it, utter silence. Eddie waited for the siren to start up again, waited for Andy to resume bashing his way out of the privy. He’d tell Tian and Rosa to run, try to cover them—
The voice that spoke from inside the battered building was colorless and flat: the voice of a machine. Both the fake smarminess and the genuine fury were gone. Andy as generations of Calla- folken had known him was gone, and for good.
“Thank you,” the voice said. “I am Andy, a messenger robot, many other functions. Serial number DNF-44821-V-63. How may I help?”
“By shutting yourself down.”
Silence from the privy.
“Do you understand what I’m asking?”
A small, horrified voice said, “Please don’t make me. You bad man. Oh, you bad man.”
“Shut yourself down now.”
A longer silence. Rosa stood with her hand pressed against her throat. Several men appeared around the side of the Pere’s house, armed with various homely weapons. Rosa waved them back.
“DNF-44821-V-63, comply!”
“Yes, Eddie of New York. I will shut myself down.” A horrible self-pitying sadness had crept into Andy’s new small voice. It made Eddie’s skin crawl. “Andy is blind and will shut down. Are you aware that with my main power cells ninety-eight per cent depleted, I may never be able to power up again?”
Eddie remembered the vast roont twins out at the Jaffords smallhold—Tia and Zalman—and then thought of all the others like them this unlucky town had known over the years. He dwelled particularly on the Tavery twins, so bright and quick and eager to please. And so beautiful. “Never won’t be long enough,” he said, “but I guess it’ll have to do. Palaver’s done, Andy. Shut down.”
Another silence from within the half-busted privy. Tian and Rosa crept up to either side of Eddie and the three of them stood together in front of the locked door. Rosa gripped Eddie’s forearm. He shook her off immediately. He wanted his hand free in case he had to draw. Although where he would shoot now that Andy’s eyes were gone, he didn’t know.
When Andy spoke again, it was in a toneless amplified voice that made Tian and Rosa gasp and step back.
Eddie stayed where he was. He had heard a voice like this and words like this once before, in the clearing of the great bear. Andy’s rap wasn’t quite the same, but close enough for government work.
“DNF-44821-V-63 IS SHUTTING DOWN! ALL SUBNUCLEAR CELLS AND MEMORY CIRCUITS ARE IN
SHUTDOWN PHASE! SHUTDOWN IS 13 PER CENT COMPLETE! I AM ANDY, MESSENGER ROBOT,