Ah, well, that’s Susannah’s tale to tell, and we will listen as she tells it to the man she
called dinh when there was a ka-tet for him to guide. And here is Susannah herself, sitting
where we saw her once before, in front of the Gin-Puppy Saloon. Parked at the hitching rail
is her chrome steed, which Eddie dubbed Suzie’s Cruisin Trike. She’s cold and hasn’t so
much as a sweater to pull close around her, but her heart tells her that her wait is almost
over. And how she hopes her heart is right, for this is a haunted place. To Susannah, the
whine of the wind sounds too much like the bewildered cries of the children who were
brought here to have their bodies roont and their minds murdered.
Beside the rusty Quonset hut up the street (the Arc 16 Experimental Station, do ya not
recall it) are the gray cyborg horses. A few more have fallen over since the last time we
visited; a few more click their heads restlessly back and forth, as if trying to see the riders who will come and untether them. But that will never happen, for the Breakers have been
set free to wander and there’s no more need of children to feed their talented heads.
And now, look you! At last comes what the lady has waited for all this long day, and the
day before, and the day before that, when Ted Brautigan, Dinky Earnshaw, and a few
others (not Sheemie, he’s gone into the clearing at the end of the path, say sorry) bade her
goodbye. The door of the Dogan opens, and a man comes out. The first thing she sees is
that his limp is gone. Next she notices his new bluejeans and shirt. Nifty duds, but he’s
otherwise as ill-prepared for this cold weather as she is. In his arms the newcomer holds a
furry animal with its ears cocked. That much is well, but the boy who should be holding the
animal is absent. No boy, and her heart fills with sorrow. Not surprise, however, because
she has known, just as yonder man (yonder chary man) would have known had she been
the one to pass from the path.
She slips down from her seat on her hands and the stumps of her legs; she hoists herself off
the boardwalk and into the street. There she raises a hand and waves it over her head.
“Roland!” she cries. “Hey, gunslinger! I’m over here!”
He sees her and waves back. Then he bends and puts down the animal. Oy races toward
her hellbent for election, head down, ears flat against his skull, running with the speed and low-slung, leaping grace of a weasel on a crust of snow. While he’s still seven feet away
from her (seven at least), he jumps into the air, his shadow flying fleetly over the packed
dirt of the street. She grabs him like a deep receiver hauling in a Hail Mary pass. The force of his forward motion knocks the breath from her and bowls her over in a puff of dust, but
the first breath she’s able to take in goes back out as laughter. She’s still laughing as he
stands with his stubby front legs on her chest and his stubby rear ones on her belly, ears up, squiggly tail wagging, licking her cheeks, her nose, her eyes.
“Let up on it!” she cries. “Let up on it, honey, ’fore you kill me!”
She hears this, so lightly meant, and her laughter stops. Oy steps off her, sits, tilts his snout at the empty blue socket of the sky, and lets loose a single long howl that tells her
everything she would need to know, had she not known already. For Oy has more eloquent
ways of speaking than his few words.
She sits up, slapping puffs of dust out of her shirt, and a shadow falls over her. She looks
up but at first cannot see Roland’s face. His head is directly in front of the sun, and it makes a fierce corona around him. His features are lost in blackness.
But he’s holding out his hands.
Part of her doesn’t want to take them, and do ya not kennit? Part of her would end it here
and send him into the Badlands alone. No matter what Eddie wanted. No matter what Jake
undoubtedly wanted, too. This dark shape with the sun blazing around its head has dragged
her out of a mostly comfortable life (oh yes, she had her ghosts—and at least one
mean-hearted demon, as well—but which of us don’t?). He has introduced her first to love,
then to pain, then to horror and loss. The deal’s run pretty much downhill, in other words. It is his balefully talented hand that has authored her sorrow, this dusty knight-errant who has come walking out of the old world in his old boots and with an old death-engine on each
hip. These are melodramatic thoughts, purple images, and the old Odetta, patron of The
Hungry i and all-around cool kitty, would no doubt have laughed at them. But she has
changed, he has changed her, and she reckons that if anyone is entitled to melodramatic
thoughts and purple images, it is Susannah, daughter of Dan.
Part of her would turn him away, not to end his quest or break his spirit (only death will do those things), but to take such light as remains out of his eyes and punish him for his
relentless unmeaning cruelty. But ka is the wheel to which we all are bound, and when the
wheel turns we must perforce turn with it, first with our heads up to heaven and then
revolving hell-ward again, where the brains inside them seem to burn. And so, instead of
turning away—
Two
Instead of turning away, as part of her wanted to do, Susannah took Roland’s hands. He
pulled her up, not to her feet (for she had none, although for awhile a pair had been given
her on loan) but into his arms. And when he tried to kiss her cheek, she turned her face so
that his lips pressed on hers.Let him understand it’s no halfway thing, she thought,
breathing her air into him and then taking his back, changed.Let him understand that if I’m
in it, I’m in to the end. God help me, I’m in with him to the end.
Three
There were clothes in the Fedic Millinery & Ladies’ Wear, but they fell apart at the touch of their hands—the moths and the years had left nothing usable. In the Fedic Hotel (QUIET
ROOMS, GUD BEDS) Roland found a cabinet with some blankets that would do them at
least against the afternoon chill. They wrapped up in them—the afternoon breeze was just enough to make their musty smell bearable—and Susannah asked about Jake, to have the
immediate pain of it out of the way.
“The writer again,” she said bitterly when he had finished, wiping away her tears. “God
damn the man.”
“My hip let go and the…and Jake never hesitated.” Roland had almost called himthe boy,
as he had taught himself to think of Elmer’s son as they closed in on Walter. Given a
second chance, he had promised himself he would never do that again.
“No, of course he didn’t,” she said, smiling. “He never would. He had a yard of guts, our
Jake. Did you take care of him? Did you do him right? I’d hear that part.”
So he told her, not failing to include Irene Tassenbaum’s promise of the rose. She nodded,
then said: “I wish we could do the same for your friend, Sheemie. He died on the train. I’m
sorry, Roland.”
Roland nodded. He wished he had tobacco, but of course there was none. He had both
guns again and they were seven Oriza plates to the good, as well. Otherwise they were
stocked with little-going-on-none.
“Did he have to push again, while you were coming here? I suppose he did. I knew one
more might kill him. Sai Brautigan did, too. And Dinky.”
“But that wasn’t it, Roland. It was his foot.”
The gunslinger looked at her, not understanding.
“He cut it on a piece of broken glass during the fight to take Blue Heaven, and the air and
dirt of that place waspoison! ” It was Detta who spat the last word, her accent so thick that the gunslinger barely understood it:Pizen! “Goddam foot swole up…toes like
sausages…then his cheeks and throat went all dusky, like a bruise…he took fever…” She
pulled in a deep breath, clutching the two blankets she wore tighter around her. “He was
delirious, but his head cleared at the end. He spoke of you, and of Susan Delgado. He spoke
with such love and such regret…” She paused, then burst out: “Wewill go there, Roland,
wewill, and if it isn’t worth it, your Tower, somehow we’ll make it worth it!”