Stephen King – The Waste Lands

on the head if there was too much spillage.

Andrew’s father had given him a glass of the foaming cider, and although he had tasted a

great many forgotten delicacies during his years in the city, he had never tasted anything

finer than that sweet, cold drink. It had been like swallowing a gust of October wind. Yet what he remembered even more clearly than the taste of the cider or the wormy shift and

squiggle of Dewlap’s muscles as he dumped the baskets was the merciless way the machine

reduced the big red-gold apples to liquid. Two dozen rollers had carried them beneath a

revolving steel drum with holes punched in it. The apples had first been squeezed and then

actually popped, spilling their juices down an inclined trough while a screen caught the

seeds and pulp.

Now his head was the cider-press and his brains were the apples. Soon they would pop as

the apples had popped beneath the roller, and the blessed darkness would swallow him.

“Andrew! Raise your head and look at me.”

He couldn’t . . . and wouldn’t even if he could. Better to just lie here and wait for the

darkness. He was supposed to be dead, anyway; hadn’t the hellish squint put a bullet in his

brain?

“It didn’t go anywhere near your brain, you horse’s ass, and you’re not dying. You’ve just

got a headache. You will die, though, if you don’t stop lying there and puling in your own

blood . . . and I will make sure, Andrew, that your dying makes what you are feeling now

seem like bliss.”

It was not the threats which caused the man on the floor to raise his head but rather the way

the owner of that penetrating, hissing voice seemed to have read his mind. His head came

up slowly, and the agony was excruciating-—heavy objects seemed to go sliding and

careering around the bony case which contained what was left of his mind, ripping bloody

channels through his brain as they went. A long, syrupy moan escaped him. There was a

flapping, tickling sensation on his right cheek, as if a dozen flies were crawling in the blood

there. He wanted to shoo them away, but he knew that he needed both hands just to support

himself.

The figure standing on the far side of the room by the hatch which led to the kitchen

looked ghastly, unreal. This was partly because the overhead lights were still strobing,

partly because he was seeing the new- comer with only one eye (he couldn’t remember what

had happened to the other and didn’t want to), but he had an idea it was mostly because the

creature was ghastly and unreal. It looked like a man . . . but die fellow who had once been

Andrew Quick had an idea it really wasn’t a man at all.

The stranger standing in front of the hatch wore a short, dark jacket belted at the waist,

faded denim trousers, and old, dusty boots—the boots of a countryman, a range-rider, or—

“Or a gunslinger, Andrew?” the stranger asked, and tittered.

The Tick-Tock Man stared desperately at the figure in the doorway, trying to see the face,

but the short jacket had a hood, and it was up. The stranger’s countenance was lost in its

shadows.

The siren stopped in mid-whoop. The emergency lights stayed on, but they at least stopped flashing.

“There,” the stranger said in his—or its—whispery, penetrating voice. “At last we can hear ourselves think.”

“Who are you?” the Tick-Tock Man asked. He moved slightly, and more of those weights

went sliding through his head, ripping fresh chan- nels in hisbrain. As terrible as that

feeling was, the awful tickling of the flies on his right cheek was somehow worse.

“I’m a man of many handles, pardner,” the man said from inside the darkness of his hood, and although his voice was grave, Tick-Tock heard laughter lurking just below the surface.

“There’s some that call me Jimmy, and some that call me Timmy; some that call me Handy

and some that call me Dandy. They can call me Loser, or they can call me Winner, just as

long as they don’t call me in too late for dinner.”

The man in the doorway threw back his head, and his laughter chilled the skin of the

wounded man’s arms and back into lumps of gooseflesh; it was like the howl of a wolf.

“I have been called the Ageless Stranger,” the man said. He began to walk toward

Tick-Tock, and as he did, the man on die floor moaned and tried to scrabble backward. “I

have also been called Merlin or Maerlyn—and who cares, because I was never that one,

although I never denied it, either. I am sometimes called the Magician … or the Wizard . . .

but I hope we can go forward together on more humble terms, Andrew. More human

terms.”

He pushed back the hood, revealing a fair, broad-browed face that was not, for all its

pleasant looks, in any way human. Large hectic roses rode the Wizard’s cheekbones; his

blue-green eyes sparkled with a gusty joy far too wild to be sane; his blue-black hair stood

up in zany clumps like the feathers of a raven; his lips, lushly red, parted to reveal the teeth of a cannibal.

“Call me Fannin,” the grinning apparition said. “Richard Fannin. That’s not exactly right, maybe, but I reckon it’s close enough for govern- ment work.” He held out a hand whose

palm was utterly devoid of lines. “What do you say, pard? Shake the hand that shook the

world.”

The creature who had once been Andrew Quick and who had been known in the halls of

the Grays as the Tick-Tock Man shrieked and again tried to wriggle backward. The flap of

scalp peeled loose by the low-caliber bullet which had only grooved his skull instead of

penetrating it swung back and forth; the long strands of gray-blonde hair continued to

tickle against his cheek. Quick, however, no longer felt it. He had even forgotten the ache

in his skull and the throb from the socket where his left eye had been. His entire

consciousness had fused into one thought: I must get away from this beast that looks like a

man.

But when the stranger seized his right hand and shook it that thought passed like a dream on waking. The scream which had been locked in Quick’s breast escaped his lips in a

lover’s sigh. He stared dumbly up at the grinning newcomer. The loose flap of his scalp

swung and dangled.

“Is that bothering you? It must be. Here!” Fannin seized the hanging flap and ripped it briskly off Quick’s head, revealing a bleary swatch of skull. There was a noise like heavy

cloth tearing. Quick shrieked.

“There, there, it only hurts for a second.” The man was now squat- ting on his hunkers before Quick and speaking as an indulgent parent might speak to a child with a splinter in

his finger. “Isn’t that so?”

“Y-Y-Yes,” Quick muttered. And it was. Already the pain was fading. And when Fannin

reached toward him again, caressing the left side of his face, Quick’s jerk backward was

only a reflex, quickly mastered. As the lineless hand stroked, he felt strength flowing back

into him. He looked up at the newcomer with dumb gratitude, lips quivering.

“Is that better, Andrew? It is, isn’t it?”

“Yes! Yes!”

“If you want to thank me—as I’m sure you do—you must say some- thing an old

acquaintance of mine used to say. He ended up betraying me, but he was a good friend for

quite some time, anyway, and I still have a soft spot in my heart for him. Say, ‘My life for

you,’ Andrew— can you say that?”

He could and he did; in fact, it seemed he couldn’t stop saying it. “My life for you! My life for you! My life for you! My life—”

The stranger touched his cheek again, but this time a huge raw bolt of pain blasted across

Andrew Quick’s head. He screamed.

“Sorry about that, but time is short and you were starting to sound like a broken record.

Andrew, let me put it to you with no bark on it: how would you like to kill the squint who

shot you? Not to mention his friends and the hardcase who brought him here—him, most of

all. Even the mutt that took your eye, Andrew—would you like that?”

“Yes!” the former Tick-Tock Man gasped. His hands clenched into bloody fists. “Yes!”

“That’s good,” the stranger said, and helped Quick to his feet, “because they have to die—they’re meddling with things they have no business meddling with. I expected Blaine

to take care of them, but things have gone much too far to depend on anything . . . after all,

who would have thought they could get as far as they have?”

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