Sweet MYTH-tery of Life by Robert Asprin

Chapter Nine;

“I love the nightlife.”

-V. DRACULA

I DON’T KNOW what I had expected for the interior of a vampire nightclub, probably because it never occurred to me that I might visit one someday, but this definitely wasn’t it.

First and foremost, it was bright. I don’t mean bright, I mean BRIGHT!!!

The lighting level was so intense the glare was almost blinding, particularly coming in from the darkness outside. Even squinting, it was so bright I could barely make out the features of the room and even had to grope a bit to keep from tripping over things.

“Whatdaya think?” Cassandra shouted over the music as she clung to my arm.

“Hard to tell!” I called back. “It’s kinda bright!”

“I know! Isn’t it great!” she said, flashing a smile that shone through the light. “Real spooky, isn’t it?”

For some reason, that made sense. In fact, suddenly the whole club did. Humans were primarily daylight lovers. When they wanted to feel daring or be scared, they went to dark places. Vampires on the other hand, normally tended to shun the light. As such, I supposed it was only natural that a place lit up like a flare would be scary to them.

“Oh, it’s not too bad . . . once your eyes adjust to it,” I said loftily.

It was the truth. My eyes were slowly getting used to the glare, allowing me to look around the place.

What it lacked in size, it made up for in noise and customers.

What seemed like hundreds of people were packed around an expanse of tiny tables, each table having a small umbrella to provide limited relief from the bright lights like . . . well, like candles on tables in a dark room back where I came from.

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