“I will be aught your Majesty may deign to make me,” responded the dwarf, “and I thank you, in all humility, for your goodness; but I would fain have the designation of mine office slightly changed. Half-witted buffoons, like Will Somers and his compeers, might well be styled ‘fools,’ seeing they were little better; but for me, I have ever been noted for sprightliness and wit, and I hope to divert your Highness in a very different sort from dullards like to those.”
“If thou lik’st not to be called ‘court fool,’ will ‘court jester’ suit thee better, thou malapert little knave?” asked Sir Thomas Seymour.
“It may suit me, yet I like it not,” replied Xit. “If I sought to be styled ‘jester’ instead of ‘fool,’ it would prove me a great fool and a sorry jester—a jester being the greatest of fools, since every man may make game of him, which, I promise your worship, no man shall do with me.”
“Aha! thou art as difficult to please as a breeding dame, thou saucy little varlet,” laughed Seymour. “What title will please thee?”
“An I be simply termed his Majesty’s faithful dwarf, I shall be well satisfied,” returned Xit, bowing obsequiously.
“Have thy wish, then,” said Edward, delighted by the mannikin’s readiness. “Henceforth I take thee into my service under that designation. Thou shalt have a dwarf’s wages and a dwarf’s livery.”
“Let my wages be full-grown, though my livery be never so scant, an please your Majesty,” rejoined Xit. “If my hire be proportioned to my size, it will come to little. Measure it rather by yonder giant. Howbeit, in any case, I humbly thank your Highness. Grant me a sword, and my happiness will be complete.”
“A bodkin would suit thee better,” observed Seymour. “What should such a jackanapes as thou do with a sword?”
“Use it in his Majesty’s defence, and in the maintenance of mine own honor,” replied Xit, with the pride of an offended Castilian.
“Nay, if a sword will make thee happy, my cutler shall provide thee one,” said the king. “Hie thee and bring those giant warders before me. I am curious to behold them.”
“Your Highness’s commands shall be promptly obeyed,” replied Xit, darting off towards the Wardrobe Tower.
“Ho, there! ye dull and sluggish Titans,” vociferated the dwarf, as he drew near the gateway beside which Gog and Magog were stationed. “Ho, there, I say! Are ye deaf as well as stupid? Come with me instantly!”
“Wherefore should we go with thee, thou restless gadabout?” rejoined Gog, leaning on his tall partisan, and looking down good-humoredly at him.
“Question not, but follow,” cried Xit, authoritatively.
“Even if we cared to comply, we could not,” rejoined Magog, the youngest and largest of the three giants. “Our post is at this gate, and we may not quit it till the guard be relieved.”
“But I am sent by the king’s Majesty to bring you to him, rebellious Titans,” cried Xit. “Obey at your peril!”
“Is this one of the gamesome little bawcock’s jests, think’st thou, Gog?” said the younger giant.
“I know not,” replied the other. “His Majesty is yonder—but if we stir from our posts without the lieutenant’s license, we shall be reprimanded.”
“But my order is from a greater than the lieutenant, or even than the constable, and ye had best not neglect it,” cried Xit, stamping his tiny foot impatiently on the ground. “Know ye, incredulous bawsons, that I am now one of the royal household.”
“Nay, an thou affirmest that, I doubt all the rest,” said Magog. “I stir not hence.”
“Neither do I,” added Gog. “Thou must invent a better tale than this, thou false imp, to lure us from our duty.”
“On my soul! your stupidity is on a par with your stature, ye huge puzzle-pates,” cried Xit. “Ye are keeping the king’s Majesty waiting all this time. Ye shall ride the wooden horse and brook the stinging lash, if you detain me much longer.”
“An it be true that the king hath sent for us, we ought to go,” observed Magog, with a perplexed look.
“Assuredly,” returned Gog; “but we have no certitude on the point. Ha! there comes Og to help us in this dilemma. What must we do, brother?” he added, as the third giant approached them with mighty strides.