The Gilded Age by Mark Twain and Charles Dudley Warner

“What’s a stirrin’, down ’bout the Forks?” continued Old Damrell.

“Well, I dunno, skasely. Ole, Drake Higgins he’s ben down to Shelby las’

week. Tuck his crap down; couldn’t git shet o’ the most uv it; hit

wasn’t no time for to sell, he say, so he ‘fotch it back agin, ‘lowin’ to

wait tell fall. Talks ’bout goin’ to Mozouri–lots uv ’ems talkin’ that-

away down thar, Ole Higgins say. Cain’t make a livin’ here no mo’, sich

times as these. Si Higgins he’s ben over to Kaintuck n’ married a high-

toned gal thar, outen the fust families, an’ he’s come back to the Forks

with jist a hell’s-mint o’ whoop-jamboree notions, folks says. He’s tuck

an’ fixed up the ole house like they does in Kaintuck, he say, an’ tha’s

ben folks come cler from Turpentine for to see it. He’s tuck an gawmed

it all over on the inside with plarsterin’.”

“What’s plasterin’?”

“I dono. Hit’s what he calls it. ‘Ole Mam Higgins, she tole me.

She say she wasn’t gwyne to hang out in no sich a dern hole like a hog.

Says it’s mud, or some sich kind o’ nastiness that sticks on n’ covers up

everything. Plarsterin’, Si calls it.”

This marvel was discussed at considerable length; and almost with

animation. But presently there was a dog-fight over in the neighborhood

of the blacksmith shop, and the visitors slid off their perch like so

many turtles and strode to the battle-field with an interest bordering on

eagerness. The Squire remained, and read his letter. Then he sighed,

and sat long in meditation. At intervals he said:

Missouri. Missouri. Well, well, well, everything is so uncertain.”

At last he said:

“I believe I’ll do it.–A man will just rot, here. My house my yard,

everything around me, in fact, shows’ that I am becoming one of these

cattle–and I used to be thrifty in other times.”

He was not more than thirty-five, but he had a worn look that made him

seem older. He left the stile, entered that part of his house which was

the store, traded a quart of thick molasses for a coonskin and a cake of

beeswax, to an old dame in linsey-woolsey, put his letter away, an went

into the kitchen. His wife was there, constructing some dried apple

pies; a slovenly urchin of ten was dreaming over a rude weather-vane of

his own contriving; his small sister, close upon four years of age, was

sopping corn-bread in some gravy left in the bottom of a frying-pan and

trying hard not to sop over a finger-mark that divided the pan through

the middle–for the other side belonged to the brother, whose musings

made him forget his stomach for the moment; a negro woman was busy

cooking, at a vast fire-place. Shiftlessness and poverty reigned in the

place.

“Nancy, I’ve made up my mind. The world is done with me, and perhaps I

ought to be done with it. But no matter–I can wait. I am going to

Missouri. I won’t stay in this dead country and decay with it. I’ve had

it on my mind sometime. I’m going to sell out here for whatever I can

get, and buy a wagon and team and put you and the children in it and

start.”

“Anywhere that suits you, suits me, Si. And the children can’t be any

worse off in Missouri than, they are here, I reckon.”

Motioning his wife to a private conference in their own room, Hawkins

said: “No, they’ll be better off. I’ve looked out for them, Nancy,” and

his face lighted. “Do you see these papers? Well, they are evidence

that I have taken up Seventy-five Thousand Acres of Land in this county-

think what an enormous fortune it will be some day! Why, Nancy, enormous

don’t express it–the word’s too tame! I tell your Nancy—-”

“For goodness sake, Si—-”

“Wait, Nancy, wait–let me finish–I’ve been secretly bailing and fuming

with this grand inspiration for weeks, and I must talk or I’ll burst!

I haven’t whispered to a soul–not a word–have had my countenance under

lock and key, for fear it might drop something that would tell even these

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