6. Since I am used to this way of writing, I fancy I could hardly make out a long letter to MD without it. I think I ought to allow for every line taken up by telling you where I dined; but that will not be above seven lines in all, half a line to a dinner. Your Ingoldsby[2] is going over, and they say here he is to be made a lord.Here was I staying in my room till two this afternoon for that puppy Sir Andrew Fountaine, who was to go with me into the City, and never came; and if I had not shot a dinner flying, with one Mr. Murray, I might have fasted, or gone to an alehouse.You never said one word of Goody Stoyte in your letter; but I suppose these winter nights we shall hear more of her. Does the Provost[3] laugh as much as he used to do? We reckon him here a good−for−nothing fellow.I design to write to your Dean one of these days, but I can never find time, nor what to say.I will think of something: but if DD[4] were not in Ireland I believe seriously I should not think of the place twice a year. Nothing there ever makes the subject of talk in any company where I am.
7. I went to−day to the City on business; but stopped at a printer’s, and stayed there: it was a most delicious day. I hear the Parliament is to be prorogued for a fortnight longer; I suppose, either because the Queen has the gout, or that Lord Treasurer is not well, or that they would do something more towards a peace. I called at Lord Treasurer’s at noon, and sat a while with Lord Harley, but his father was asleep. A bookseller has reprinted or new− titled a sermon of Tom Swift’s,[5] printed last year, and publishes an advertisement calling it Dr. Swift’s Sermon. Some friend of Lord Galway[6] has, by his directions, published a four−shilling book about his conduct in Spain, to defend him; I have but just seen it. But what care you for books, except Presto’s Miscellanies? Leigh promised to call and see me, but has not yet; I hope he will take care of his cargo, and get your Chester box. A murrain take that box! everything is spoiled that is in it. How does the strong box do? You say nothing of Raymond: is his wife brought to bed again; or how? has he finished his house; paid his debts; and put out the rest of the money to use? I am glad to hear poor Joe is like to get his two hundred pounds. I suppose Trim is now reduced to slavery again. I am glad of it; the people were as great rascals as LETTER 34.
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the gentlemen. But I must go to bed, sirrahs: the Secretary is still at Hampton Court with my papers, or is come only to− night. They plague me with attending them.
8. I was with the Secretary this morning, and we dined with Prior, and did business this afternoon till about eight; and I must alter and undo, and a clutter. I am glad the Parliament is prorogued. I stayed with Prior till eleven; the Secretary left us at eight. Prior, I believe, will be one of those employed to make the peace, when a Congress is opened. Lord Ashburnham told to−day at the Coffee−house that Lord Harley[7] was yesterday morning married to the Duke of Newcastle’s daughter, the great heiress, and it got about all the town. But I saw Lord Harley yesterday at noon in his nightgown, and he dined in the City with Prior and others; so it is not true; but I hope it will be so; for I know it has been privately managing this long time:[8] the lady will not have half her father’s estate; for the Duke left Lord Pelham’s son his heir.[9] The widow Duchess will not stand to the will, and she is now at law with Pelham. However, at worst, the girl will have about ten thousand pounds a year to support the honour; for Lord Treasurer will never save a groat for himself. Lord Harley is a very valuable young gentleman; and they say the girl is handsome, and has good sense, but red hair.
9. I designed a jaunt into the City to−day to be merry, but was disappointed; so one always is in this life; and I could not see Lord Dartmouth to−day, with whom I had some business. Business and pleasure both disappointed. You can go to your Dean, and for want of him, Goody Stoyte, or Walls, or Manley, and meet everywhere with cards and claret. I dined privately with a friend on a herring and chicken, and half a flask of bad Florence. I begin to have fires now, when the mornings are cold. I have got some loose bricks at the back of my grate for good husbandry. Fine weather. Patrick tells me my caps are wearing out. I know not how to get others. I want a necessary woman strangely. I am as helpless as an elephant.I had three packets from the Archbishop of Dublin, cost me four shillings, all about Higgins,[10] printed stuff, and two long letters. His people forgot to enclose them to Lewis; and they were only directed to Doctor Swift, without naming London or anything else. I wonder how they reached me, unless the postmaster directed them. I have read all the trash, and am weary.
10. Why, if you must have it out, something is to be published of great moment,[11] and three or four great people are to see there are no mistakes in point of fact: and ’tis so troublesome to send it among them, and get their corrections, that I am weary as a dog. I dined to−day with the printer, and was there all the afternoon; and it plagues me, and there’s an end, and what would you have? Lady Dupplin, Lord Treasurer’s daughter,[12] is brought to bed of a son. Lord Treasurer has had an ugly return of his gravel. ‘Tis good for us to live in gravel pits,[13] but not for gravel pits to live in us; a man in this case should leave no stone unturned. Lord Treasurer’s sickness, the Queen’s gout, the forwarding the peace, occasion putting off the Parliament a fortnight longer. My head has had no ill returns. I had good walking to−day in the City, and take all opportunities of it on purpose for my health; but I can’t walk in the Park, because that is only for walking’s sake, and loses time, so I mix it with business. I wish MD walked half as much as Presto. If I was with you, I’d make you walk; I would walk behind or before you, and you should have masks on, and be tucked up like anything; and Stella is naturally a stout walker, and carries herself firm; methinks I see her strut, and step clever over a kennel; and Dingley would do well enough if her petticoats were pinned up; but she is so embroiled, and so fearful, and then Stella scolds, and Dingley stumbles, and is so daggled.[14] Have you got the whalebone petticoats among you yet? I hate them; a woman here may hide a moderate gallant under them.
Pshaw, what’s all this I’m saying? Methinks I am talking to MD face to face.
11. Did I tell you that old Frowde,[15] the old fool, is selling his estate at Pepperhara, and is skulking about the town nobody knows where? and who do you think manages all this for him, but that rogue Child,[16] the double squire of Farnham? I have put Mrs. Masham, the Queen’s favourite, upon buying it, but that is yet a great secret; and I have employed Lady Oglethorpe to inquire about it. I was with Lady Oglethorpe to−day, who is come to town for a week or two, and to−morrow I will see to hunt out the old fool: he is utterly ruined, and at this present in some blind alley with some dirty wench. He has two sons that must starve, and he never gives them a farthing. If Mrs. Masham buys the land, I will desire her to get the Queen to give some pension LETTER 34.
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to the old fool, to keep him from absolutely starving. What do you meddle with other people’s affairs for?
says Stella. Oh, but Mr. Masham and his wife are very urgent with me, since I first put them in the head of it.
I dined with Sir Matthew Dudley, who, I doubt, will soon lose his employment.
12. Morning. I am going to hunt out old Frowde, and to do some business in the City. I have not yet called to Patrick to know whether it be fair.It has been past dropping these two days. Rainy weather hurts my pate and my purse. He tells me ’tis very windy, and begins to look dark; woe be to my shillings! an old saying and a true,