“As for the ylver—the Sisterhood can’t stop them. It has no great army to hold them off, nor will the tribes and kingdoms gather to Sarkia in support. Consider how helpless they were at Ferny Cove, when an ylvin army came!”
Just for a moment he showed emotion. Fervor. “That is ever in my mind. I was there; the cruelties went beyond evil. But helpless? Sarkia’s magic troubled them greatly. We found our way through them by dint of her spells—hers and those she’d trained. Dense fogs arose in broad daylight, spreading over the country, and only the chosen could see through them. While ylvin warriors—even ylvin!—fell asleep on horseback, or at their posts. Else I’d be dead, as your children are.”
My children! Would I even have recognized them? “On Farside,” she answered, “each mother raises and cherishes her own children, and each child cherishes its mother. Have you ever wished to cherish your mother?”
He shrugged. “It is all the same to me. The Sisterhood is my mother.”
“It’s not the same to me! I have a husband who has sworn himself to me, and I to him. By our own choice. Idri stole me from him—Idri and a cull named Xader—and brought me back through the Oz Gate. My husband and I love each other; we were happy beyond anything you’ve known. And if I can, I’ll return to him. Together we’ll go far from any gate, have children by ones and twos, raise them ourselves, and love them.”
She couldn’t read the man at all; his aura hardly changed. What must Sarkia have done to him when she’d chosen to train him as a tracker! After a moment he spoke, as impassive as before. “But you can’t, you see. Return to him. For I’ve caught you, and we are going back to the Cloister together. This time you’ll like it there.”
She stared quietly for a moment, then softly her mind caressed his. “Have you ever had a woman, Tomm? Held one in your arms?”
“I have never wished for one. But if I did, Sarkia would give one to me. You waste your breath, Varia.”
“You’ve never wished for one because Sarkia spelled you as a child. Deprived you of your birthright, as she deprived you of your mother’s love. Sarkia is evil, Tomm.”
Again the pause before his answer. “If she does evil, it’s for a greater good.”
“Ah! So now evil is good! And day is night, and hunger a full belly! She’s twisted your mind, Tomm, as she did the minds of us all. As the first Dynast did hers. But I lived more than twenty years on Farside, and unlearned much that I’d been taught. I wish I could take you through with me. You’d like my husband, Curtis Macurdy. He is honest and good, and you would have a friend at last. The two of you could farm together, drink coffee and talk together. Go to Decatur, eat ‘ice cream’ ”—she said the words in English— “and see a ‘movie.’ You could even learn to laugh!”
Tomm stared at her silently for so long, she wondered if he’d answer at all. “You must get up now,” he said at last, patiently. “It’s time to start back.” There was no more expression in his voice than before.
She got to her feet without help. You won’t take me back, she vowed to herself. You won’t. Somewhere along the way you’ll let your guard down, and I’ll kill you. With knife or rock, or sharp stick through your eye, I’ll kill you. Then I’ll walk to Ferny Cove, and once I’ve gated through, they’ll never catch me. Not again.
13: Cyncaidh
The trail was familiar from the day before, but much slower now. She was drained, physically and emotionally, the urgency was past, and the trail was mostly uphill. In late afternoon they were still short of Laurel Notch.
It was Tomm’s responsibility to keep alert, thus she’d let her mind wander. She imagined him dead and her slipping through the gate at Ferny Cove. And finding Curtis: She visualized it happening at the farm in Indiana. He’d be overjoyed. They’d hug and cry and kiss, then run together into the house and make love, and the terrible months in the Tiger barracks would be forgotten.