The Little Warrior by P. G. Wodehouse

“I don’t know,” she said. “I suppose I shall have to start trying to find something.”

“But —”

Jill drew him suddenly into the dark alley-way leading to the stage-door of the Gotham Theatre’s nearest neighbor: and, as she did so, a long, thin form, swathed in an overcoat and surmounted by an opera-hat, flashed past.

“I don’t think I could have gone through another meeting with Mr Pilkington,” said Jill. “It wasn’t his fault, and he was quite justified, but what he said about Uncle Chris rather hurt.”

Wally, who had ideas of his own similar to those of Mr Pilkington on the subject of Uncle Chris and had intended to express them, prudently kept them unspoken.

“I suppose,” he said, “there is no doubt — ?”

“There can’t be. Poor Uncle Chris! He is like Freddie. He means well!”

There was a pause. They left the alley and walked down the street.

“Where are you going now?” asked Wally.

“I’m going home.”

“Where’s home?”

“Forty-ninth Street. I live in a boarding-house there.” A sudden recollection of the boarding-house at which she had lived in Atlantic City smote Wally, and it turned the scale. He had not intended to speak, but he could not help himself.

“Jill!” he cried. “It’s no good. I must say it! I want to get you out of all this. I want to take care of you. Why should you go on living this sort of life, when. — Why won’t you let me — ?”

He stopped. Even as he spoke, he realized the futility of what he was saying. Jill was not a girl to be won with words.

They walked on in silence for a moment. They crossed Broadway, noisy with night traffic, and passed into the stillness on the other side.

“Wally,” said Jill at last.

She was looking straight in front of her. Her voice was troubled.

“Yes?”

Jill hesitated.

“Wally, you wouldn’t want me to marry you if you knew you weren’t the only man in the world that mattered to me, would you?”

They had reached Sixth Avenue before Wally replied.

“No!” he said.

For an instant, Jill could not have said whether the feeling that shot through her like the abrupt touching of a nerve was relief or disappointment. Then suddenly she realized that it was disappointment. It was absurd to her to feel disappointed, but at that moment she would have welcomed a different attitude in him. If only this problem of hers could be taken forcefully out of her hands, what a relief it would be. If only Wally, masterfully insistent, would batter down her hesitations and grab her, knock her on the head and carry her off like a caveman, care less about her happiness and concentrate on his own, what a solution it would be. — But then he wouldn’t be Wally. — Nevertheless, Jill gave a little sigh. Her new life had changed her already. It had blunted the sharp edge of her independence. Tonight she was feeling the need of some one to lean on—some one strong and cosy and sympathetic who would treat her like a little girl and shield her from all the roughness of life. The fighting spirit had gone out of her, and she was no longer the little warrior facing the world with a brave eye and a tilted chin. She wanted to cry and be petted.

“No!” said Wally again. There had been the faintest suggestion of a doubt when he had spoken the word before, but now it shot out like a bullet. “And I’ll tell you why. I want you—and, if you married me feeling like that, it wouldn’t be you. I want Jill, the whole Jill, and nothing but Jill, and, if I can’t have that, I’d rather not have anything. Marriage isn’t a motion-picture close-up with slow fade-out on the embrace. It’s a partnership, and what’s the good of a partnership if your heart’s not in it? It’s like collaborating with a man you dislike. — I believe you wish sometimes—not often, perhaps, but when you’re feeling lonely and miserable—that I would pester and bludgeon you into marrying me. — What’s the matter?”

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