“They are not going to find what they want,” he said to Hory.
The Patrolman lay in the webbing as one exhausted. The blood on his cheek was clotting. His eyes were half closed.
“You have not won either,” he said, his words slurred.
“We never wanted to win anything,” I responded, “except our own freedom.”
Then I felt a sudden strange sensation, a sharpening of contact- Eet’s thoughts? NO! For the first time I touched, not Eet, in such communication, but another human brain directly.
I tried to break away. It had been hard at first to accept that Eet could so invade my mind at will. But somehow I had been able to stand it because he was alien. This was far different. I was being pushed against my will into a raging torrent which whirled me on and on. And even to this day I can find no proper words to express what happened. I learned what – who – Hory really was – as no man should ever know one of his fellows. It is too harsh a stripping, that. And he must have learned the same of me. I knew that he meant to bring me to his form of justice, that he looked upon me with scorn because of my association with Eet. I could see – and see – and see- And that enforced sharing went on forever and ever. I saw Hory not only as he was now, but as he had been back and back down a trail of years – all of which had formed him into the man he now was – just as he must also see me-
I fought vainly against the power which made me see so, for I feared I would be utterly lost in that other mind, that Hory was becoming me, and I Hory. And we would be so firmly welded together in the end that there would be no Hory and Jern, but some unnatural whirling mass fighting itself – trapped so-
Then I was released and flew out of the mind stream as if some whirlpool had thrust me off and out. I lay retching on the floor, aware again that I had a body, an identity of my own. I heard noises from the pilot’s chair which suggested my sickness was shared, even as we had shared other things – too many of them.
Somehow I got to my hands and knees and crawled to the wall again, once more pulled myself up by holding to the equipment here. I faced around slowly to stare at Hory, while he looked back at me, dully, with a kind of shrinking.
Beyond him, on the. floor, lay a small flaccid body-
Eet!
Keeping hold on the wall, for without that support I was now helpless to move, I edged along until I passed Hory to stand above the mutant. Then I let go, fell to the floor rather than knelt, to gather up Eet’s body and hold it tight against me. That same emotion which had moved me when Hory had tried to kill Eet in the engine room flooded through me once more. It strengthened me, shaking me completely out of my daze.
Eet had done that – had made us free of one another’s minds. And he had done it for a purpose. I cradled Eet’s too-limp body, smoothing his wiry fur, trying to discover some indication he still lived.
“You know,” I said to Hory, “why-“
“I know-“ His words came with long pauses between them. “Is – he – dead?”
I stroked and smoothed, tried to feel some light breathing, the pound of a heartbeat, but to no purpose. Even so, I could not allow myself to believe the worst.
However, I did not try to reach Eet’s mind. Now I shrank painfully from such contact. I had wounds which must heal, the strangest wounds any of my species may ever have borne.
“The- aid- kit-“ Hory’s right hand rose, shaking badly. Yet he managed to point to a compartment in the far wall. “A stimulant-“
Perhaps. But how well medication intended for our breed would serve Eet I did not know. I worked up to my feet again, holding the mutant tightly to me, and began that long journey around the cabin. One-handed, I fumbled with the latch, snapped open the cubby. There was a box – in it a capsule. And that was slippery between my fingers, so I had to use care to bring it forth. One-handed, I could not crush it.
Holding it and Eet, I retraced my steps, bracing myself erect by one shoulder against the wall, back to Hory. I held out the capsule. He took it from me with trembling fingers while I steadied Eet’s body. Hory broke the capsule under that pointed nose, released the fumes of the volatile gas. His hands fell back into his lap, as if even that small exertion had completely exhausted him.
Eet sneezed, gasped. His eyes opened and his head moved feebly as it turned so he could see who held him. He did not try to leave my hands.
Once more I gathered him close to me, so that the head, raised a little as if to welcome such contact, now rested on my shoulder close to my chin.
“He is alive,” Hory whispered. “But he- did- that-“
“Yes.”
“Because we must know – and knowing-“ The Patrolman hesitated until I prompted:
“And knowing – what? You are wedded to your purposes. But you must know now that mine were not as you believed.”
“Yes. But – I have my duty.”
He gazed at me, but again as if he did not see me for what I was, but rather beyond, into some future.
“We are not meant-“ He continued after a pause, “to know our own kind in that way. I do not want to see you now, it makes me – sick-“ His mouth worked as if he were about to be physically ill.
My stomach churned in sympathy. He was right. To look at him and remember- Man is not vile – most men – nor depraved, nor monstrous. But neither is he meant to violate another as we had done. Having Eet as a conductor between our minds was one thing; to be directly joined – never again!
“It was meant that we might understand. Words can be screens – we needed free minds,” I said. Were he to retreat now into a denial, an attempt to be as we were before, he would negate all Eet had done to save us. That I dared not allow.
“Yes. You – are – not as we thought.” He appeared to make that concession against his will. “But – I have my orders-“
“We can bargain.” I repeated Eet’s earlier suggestion. “I have something to offer – a cache, untouched, of the stones. Did you read that also?” That was my one fear. That when my thoughts had been laid bare to him, he had uncovered all I needed, for the sake of the future, to hide.
“Not that.” He turned his head away. Looking at me bothered him. “But the Guild-“
“Does not know of this one. Nor shall they find it.” I could not be sure of that, I could only hope. However, I thought I had a right to argue.
“What do you want in return?”
I made my first offer as I did because there is no reason why one should not begin at the highest point, as every trader knows. “Freedom – to begin with. After that – well, I am a masterless man with Vondar Ustle gone – in a way he died for this. I want a ship-“
“Ship?” Hory repeated the word as if it were new to him. “You – a ship-?”
“Because I am no pilot?” I chose thus to interpret his surprise. “True, but pilots can be hired. I want payment – our freedom and credits enough to buy a ship. In return – the position of the cache. It seems to me the price is low-“
“I am not authorized to make any such bargains-“
“No?” And then I repeated two words, drawing them out of the time when we had been one.
He turned his head laboriously to look at me again, his face very cold and set.
“True – you know that also. So-“ He added nothing, but closed his eyes.
I felt a soft bump against my chin as Eet moved his head, almost as if he nodded approval. Eet had been suspicious of Hory. He had reported a shield – had he suspected what might lie below that? Known that this was no simple scout but a Double Star Commander, sent on a special mission? Or had only suspicion been his before he hurled us mind to mind?
A Double Star, one of those whose word could be accepted at once in an agreement. If Hory did now so agree, we were safe.