those who go do not return.”
He chuckled. “Like that, is it? Well, it’s not likely we’d need to return.
You’ll give us food then?”
“For six days only. We can afford no more. After that you’ll be on your own.
I’ll give you rifles and ten balls per man, and the powder for it, and where you
go after that is wherever you like, but I’ll have no quitters with me.”
I looked him square in the face.
“You’ll stay now, or you’ll go and not come back. You came knowing what lay
ahead, and now at the smell of gold, which probably isn’t there, you’d go. Well,
go and be damned!”
“You talk very big for a man who’ll soon be alone.”
“He’ll not be alone,” said Jublain. “I’ll be with him.”
“And I,” Ring added.
“You’re fools then,” he said. “There’ll be few else.”
“That may be,” I replied, “but there may be more loyal men here than you think.”
For the first time I saw doubt in his eyes, but he shook it off. The dream was
more pleasant to believe than to doubt.
The taunting expression came to his face. He wanted to get back at me, to hurt
me, worry me, anger me. “Well, Barnabas, if there’s no gold I can always join
Nick Bardle.”
“Why not? There’s always room on a gibbet.”
He turned sharply away, and Jublain made as if to start after him. “He needs
killing,” he said, when I stopped him.
“No doubt, but here is a good time to be rid of any troublemakers. I want nobody
with me who will not go the distance.”
Yet there were steps I could take, and I took them. Recharging several pistols
and a musket, I kept them at hand, and suggested to Jublain, Jeremy, and Pim
that they stay close about.
Delve went to the edge of the wood with a dozen others and there was much talk
going on.
“Pim,” I said, “do you go to the Abigail. Tell Tilly what goes on, and tell him
to stand by for trouble and allow no one aboard unless with an order writ by my
hand.”
Aboard the Abigail, I felt sure John Tilly would stand.
Pim was back within the hour. “They’ll stand for you,” he said, “every man of
them.”
“Good! Now let us close the gate.”
We did so, and Jeremy went to the walls where he could keep a lookout, and a
weather-eye on the dissenters.
When they were up and coming to the gate in a group, Ring called softly and I
came up to the wall with him. Wa-ga-su came to me and wished to know what it was
that had happened, and I explained to him. He shook his head in amazement, but
went back to squat against the wall and watch.
Jonathan Delve was in the lead. When they came up to the gate and found it
closed, they stopped, obviously surprised.
“Well, men, what is it?”
“Open the gate!” Delve shouted. “We want our belongings. We are going for the
gold.”
“It shall be as agreed,” I said. “I think you go upon a fool’s errand. Yet you
shall have what I promised.”
Then we lowered over to them the muskets and the food, and with much angry
grumbling and shouting they marched away.
Some we did well without, yet others were good men led astray by a promise of
gold. We stood together upon the walls, making a brave show of it, but we knew
all too well that we were too few to defend the fort against a strong attack as
Bardle might make. Not to mention the Indians.
“Do you think they know how many have gone? The Indians, I mean?” Jublain asked.
“If they do not know, they will. There will be tracks left, and they will follow
and observe. I think our friends have not chosen wisely.”
I was already thinking of what was to come. We had a winter to get through
before we could march to the mountains.
In the following days we stayed close by, gathering food, drying the meat from
our hunting, gathering clams along the shore, fishing. Always, two of us
remained within the fort, and now the great gate was always closed, and we used
the smaller gate. It was easier to open and shut as well as to guard.
“I fear for them.” Tilly had come to the fort to eat, leaving Blue in command of
the Abigail. “They will find much trouble at Roanoke, unless they have great
luck.”
The lost colony. Would the same fate overtake us?
There was time then to get out the maps and charts and pore over them, to
speculate on what lay beyond the blue mountains and the best way to reach them.
Wa-ga-su had a quick intelligence, and grasped at once almost any idea that was
not totally beyond the range of his experience. Our needs he understood at once.
He would guide us to his home country. He would show us a way into the
mountains, but when we offered him a chance to go along, he refused.
“Have you thought of a voyage first?” Tilly suggested. “We have many timbers cut
for masts, many skins, and much potash. It would be a valuable cargo.”
“I cannot risk England,” I said.
“Then what of the Spanish islands? Or France?”
Uneasily, I considered the subject. It was true we had a full and heavy cargo.
Our work would be for naught if we left it on the ground and went away to the
mountains.
The decision would have to be mine. To go meant to move, to move meant to risk
the sea, conflict, and possibly capture and death.
John Tilly wished to go. There were good reasons for it and Abby, I knew, would
leave the choice to me.
The rain fell softly, whispering gently down upon our roofs, beating a soft
tattoo upon our walls. It would be wet in the forest, wet upon the trails, and
out beyond the Banks would be the cold gray wintry sea, rolling its combers down
from the northland. The great breakers would be snarling along the sand. Again I
seemed to feel the tip and bow of a deck beneath my feet.
Once more the lights of a harbor seemed to beckon to me, once more the sound of
music and laughter.
Tomorrow, I promised myself, I would decide …
Our walls were strong here, our food supply good. Out there? No wall could stand
against the sea, and good ship though we had, there were ships that were faster,
more heavily gunned.
The weight of the burden lay heavy upon me. Now that I must decide for others,
my decisions came not so quickly, for any move might mean the death of my wife,
of a friend, or the loss of our ship.
Yet each move one makes is a risk, and if one thinks too long one does not move
at all, for fear of what may come, and so becomes immobile, crouched in a shell,
fearful of any move.
I would sleep the night, I would think much upon what I might do, but I think
the decision was already made.
We would go to sea once more.
20
Our first task was to bring closer to the fort the Abigail, and to careen her
there so her bottom might be scraped free of encrusted barnacles. If this was
not done, not only would her bottom soon be damaged but her sailing speed would
be slowed, and this we could not have. In many a situation to be encountered at
sea, only speed could lead to safety.
By night I sat over my table, working upon our meager supply of paper to see
what could be done as to armament and cargo. Again and again I went over the
stowage of that cargo to keep our vessel seaworthy and in balance, for the
stowage of cargo is no simple matter.
Tilly, Ring, and Jublain were often with me. Tilly was the most knowing as to
stowage and the management of such cargo. Jublain knew the most of the use of
ordnance, and Ring, to my surprise, knew much of marketing.
On the latter, I consulted often with Abigail, too, for she had made many
voyages with her father and had heard him talk of trade and the market in many
lands, and also the talk of those who consorted and traded with him.
Meanwhile I went over my charts and considered much as to exactly where we
should go. England would have been my first choice, but England meant almost
certain prison for me. It would likely be fully as dangerous for us to approach
any other port in Christian Europe. Yet I thought much of the harbors of
Brittany, where many ships were built, where we of the fens were known, and