TOM SAWYER ABROAD

that you know something about.”

“Why, Mars Tom, sholy you can’t mean to say I

don’t know about shirts, when, goodness knows, I’s

toted home de washin’ ever sence –”

“I tell you, this hasn’t got anything to do with

shirts. I only –”

“Why, Mars Tom, you said yo’self dat a letter –”

“Do you want to drive me crazy? Keep still. I

only used it as a metaphor.”

That word kinder bricked us up for a minute. Then

Jim says — rather timid, because he see Tom was get-

ting pretty tetchy:

“Mars Tom, what is a metaphor?”

“A metaphor’s a — well, it’s a — a — a metaphor’s

an illustration.” He see THAT didn’t git home, so he

tried again. “When I say birds of a feather flocks

together, it’s a metaphorical way of saying –”

“But dey DON’T, Mars Tom. No, sir, ‘deed dey

don’t. Dey ain’t no feathers dat’s more alike den a

bluebird en a jaybird, but ef you waits till you catches

dem birds together, you’ll –”

“Oh, give us a rest! You can’t get the simplest

little thing through your thick skull. Now don’t bother

me any more.”

Jim was satisfied to stop. He was dreadful pleased

with himself for catching Tom out. The minute Tom

begun to talk about birds I judged he was a goner,

because Jim knowed more about birds than both of us

put together. You see, he had killed hundreds and

hundreds of them, and that’s the way to find out

about birds. That’s the way people does that writes

books about birds, and loves them so that they’ll

go hungry and tired and take any amount of trouble to

find a new bird and kill it. Their name is ornitholo-

gers, and I could have been an ornithologer myself,

because I always loved birds and creatures; and I

started out to learn how to be one, and I see a bird

setting on a limb of a high tree, singing with its head

tilted back and its mouth open, and before I thought I

fired, and his song stopped and he fell straight down

from the limb, all limp like a rag, and I run and picked

him up and he was dead, and his body was warm in my

hand, and his head rolled about this way and that, like

his neck was broke, and there was a little white skin

over his eyes, and one little drop of blood on the side

of his head; and, laws! I couldn’t see nothing more

for the tears; and I hain’t never murdered no creature

since that warn’t doing me no harm, and I ain’t going

to.

But I was aggravated about that welkin. I wanted

to know. I got the subject up again, and then Tom

explained, the best he could. He said when a person

made a big speech the newspapers said the shouts of

the people made the welkin ring. He said they always

said that, but none of them ever told what it was, so

he allowed it just meant outdoors and up high. Well,

that seemed sensible enough, so I was satisfied, and

said so. That pleased Tom and put him in a good

humor again, and he says:

“Well, it’s all right, then; and we’ll let bygones

be bygones. I don’t know for certain what a welkin

is, but when we land in London we’ll make it ring,

anyway, and don’t you forget it.”

He said an erronort was a person who sailed around

in balloons; and said it was a mighty sight finer to be

Tom Sawyer the Erronort than to be Tom Sawyer the

Traveler, and we would be heard of all round the

world, if we pulled through all right, and so he wouldn’t

give shucks to be a traveler now.

Toward the middle of the afternoon we got every-

thing ready to land, and we felt pretty good, too, and

proud; and we kept watching with the glasses, like

Columbus discovering America. But we couldn’t see

nothing but ocean. The afternoon wasted out and the

sun shut down, and still there warn’t no land any-

wheres. We wondered what was the matter, but

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