WHAT IS MAN? AND OTHER ESSAYS OF MARK TWAIN

progressive degradation; a descent which reaches bottom at last,

when the street becomes a roost for humble professionals of the

faith-cure and fortune-telling sort.

What a queer, melancholy house, what a queer, melancholy

street! I don’t think I was ever in a street before when quite

so many professional ladies, with English surnames, preferred

Madam to Mrs. on their door-plates. And the poor old place has

such a desperately conscious air of going to the deuce. Every

house seems to wince as you go by, and button itself up to the

chin for fear you should find out it had no shirt on–so to

speak. I don’t know what’s the reason, but these material tokens

of a social decay afflict me terribly; a tipsy woman isn’t

dreadfuler than a haggard old house, that’s once been a home, in

a street like this.

Mr. Howells’s pictures are not mere stiff, hard, accurate

photographs; they are photographs with feeling in them, and

sentiment, photographs taken in a dream, one might say.

As concerns his humor, I will not try to say anything, yet I

would try, if I had the words that might approximately reach up

to its high place. I do not think any one else can play with

humorous fancies so gracefully and delicately and deliciously as

he does, nor has so many to play with, nor can come so near

making them look as if they were doing the playing themselves and

he was not aware that they were at it. For they are unobtrusive,

and quiet in their ways, and well conducted. His is a humor

which flows softly all around about and over and through the mesh

of the page, pervasive, refreshing, health-giving, and makes no

more show and no more noise than does the circulation of the

blood.

There is another thing which is contentingly noticeable in

Mr. Howells’s books. That is his “stage directions”–those

artifices which authors employ to throw a kind of human

naturalness around a scene and a conversation, and help the

reader to see the one and get at meanings in the other which

might not be perceived if entrusted unexplained to the bare words

of the talk. Some authors overdo the stage directions, they

elaborate them quite beyond necessity; they spend so much time

and take up so much room in telling us how a person said a thing

and how he looked and acted when he said it that we get tired and

vexed and wish he hadn’t said it all. Other authors’ directions

are brief enough, but it is seldom that the brevity contains

either wit or information. Writers of this school go in rags, in

the matter of state directions; the majority of them having

nothing in stock but a cigar, a laugh, a blush, and a bursting

into tears. In their poverty they work these sorry things to the

bone. They say:

“. . . replied Alfred, flipping the ash from his cigar.”

(This explains nothing; it only wastes space.)

“. . . responded Richard, with a laugh.” (There was nothing

to laugh about; there never is. The writer puts it in from

habit–automatically; he is paying no attention to his work; or

he would see that there is nothing to laugh at; often, when a

remark is unusually and poignantly flat and silly, he tries to

deceive the reader by enlarging the stage direction and making

Richard break into “frenzies of uncontrollable laughter.” This

makes the reader sad.)

“. . . murmured Gladys, blushing.” (This poor old shop-worn

blush is a tiresome thing. We get so we would rather Gladys

would fall out of the book and break her neck than do it again.

She is always doing it, and usually irrelevantly. Whenever it is

her turn to murmur she hangs out her blush; it is the only thing

she’s got. In a little while we hate her, just as we do

Richard.)

“. . . repeated Evelyn, bursting into tears.” (This kind

keep a book damp all the time. They can’t say a thing without

crying. They cry so much about nothing that by and by when they

have something to cry ABOUT they have gone dry; they sob, and

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